


Catatonic

by Stickyfrog



Category: South Park
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Fucked Up, Hearing Voices, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Insanity, Light Bondage, M/M, Medicinal Drug Use, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mental Institutions, Obsessive-Compulsive, Paranoia, Schizophrenia, Stabbing, Underage Drinking, Vomiting, Wet Dream, sedative abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 06:17:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2537282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stickyfrog/pseuds/Stickyfrog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Are there any sex offenders in the area? Who lives above us? What if they fall through the ceiling and CRUSH US?! I need to google my probability of being stabbed in this part of town…</p><p>Warning: Please be advised that although this is a rather romantic and fluffy story for me it is rather violent and may have abuse/ED triggers (although no one in the story specifically has an ED).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Catatonic

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own South Park.  
> I'm sorry for hurting them.  
> No beta, but not opposed to finding one. Sorry for any mistakes!

Tweek Tweak loved working at Harbucks, the regular coffee was free to employees and the job itself was fairly low pressure (as long as he didn’t work the registers). “One large iced soy café latte coming right up!” Pip’s accent always charmed the customers, at least much better than Tweeks stuttering shrieks did.

Pip set the cup down in front of Tweek who let out a little “Bah!” at the sound it made hitting the counter. His shaking hands were accustomed to making each drink on the menu but they still had a tremor to them. Pip had jokingly set up a white board that listed how many days it had been since Tweek dropped someone’s drink, today it said ‘86’. Tweek was relieved, ‘WHAT?! _That’s like almost three months! Oh my god! What if I drop one today?! Pressure… ’_

“Just… ice and espresso.” Craig’s monotone drawl spilled over the counter.

“Caramel latte, extra sauce… and whipped cream! Lots and lots of whipped cream!” Clyde was excitedly bouncing next to his best friend. Craig made a gagging noise. _Craig and Clyde are both so attractive! They would look so good kissing… Gah, no!_

Clyde always talked while Tweek was making his coffee, which made him twice as jittery. “Hey Tweek!”

“WHAT?!” Tweek poured some caramel sauce over his thumb, turning his head violently at the noise.

“Calm down man. We’re going to hang out at Token’s tonight, watch a marathon of super hero movies. You in?” Clyde did all the talking but Craig looked inquisitive too.

“Oh god! I guess so…” Tweek said with a look of dismay.

“Nothing bad is going to happen, Tweek.” Craig added.

“Uh, yeah…” Tweek placed Craig’s iced espresso on the counter and turned back to the dreaded whip cream canister. “I’ll just take my Diazepam before we go so I don’t … do whatever it is I normally… do. Gah!”

“Yeah.” Craig agreed shortly.

“No way! I hate when you’re on that stuff, you’re like a drooling statue.” Clyde frowned.

“More normal…” Tweek poured some extra caramel on top of the whipped cream in Clyde’s cup and handed it over, a little cream sloshing onto the counter.

* * *

Craig and Clyde were showing up soon to pick Tweek up. Tweek stood by his kitchen counter with a mug of coffee and his bottle of pills. No one ever complained when he was catatonic, he was sure it was what kept him having any friends at all. _Bottoms up…._

**HONK HONK**

“AHHH!” Tweek gathered his things and shuffled out the door to Craig’s truck. “Hey! Sorry!” He shouted climbing into the passenger side.

“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t do anything.” Craig grumbled. Tweek shrugged. During the trip Tweek could feel his medicine kicking in, his body slowly slid against the door of the truck, all shaking and fear gone, all of Tweek gone...

“Ug, he took that fucking zombie shit, didn’t he?” Clyde said poking at Tweek’s shoulder.

“He said he was going to,” Craig shook his head, “It’s probably for the best.” He stopped the engine and the two men worked together to pull Tweek into a standing position. He could walk a little but he just stared ahead with deer-in-headlight eyes, as if his brain had been turned off.

Token turned at the sound of his friend’s entering. “Oh, you brought a Tweek, how thoughtful,” He joked, “just throw him on the bean bag.” They followed the order, dropping the limp boy into the bean chair. Craig stooped down and rubbed Tweeks back for a minute, “you need anything, buddy?” he asked softly. Craig had always had a soft spot for Tweek, even he wasn’t sure if it was genuine concern or pity.

“Coffee.” Tweek whispered in reply, staring at the ground in front of him.

“Of course.” Craig left to seek out Tweek’s coffee in Token’s kitchen. Clyde frowned at the slumped form that was once his friend. _How could Craig agree with this drug bullshit!_

Clyde pulled out his phone and typed into the search browser ‘Diazepam side effects’. _Drowsiness, Memory problems, Dizziness, spinning, restlessness, muscle weakness, nausea, drooling, slurred speech, blurred vision, double vision, mild rash, itching, loss of sex drive… Holy Fuck! That’s just the common side effects!_

Clyde kneeled next to Tweek and tapped his face lightly, “hey, you there?” _no answer_. “What if I was going to stab you right now? Would that make you do something… anything…”. Tweeks shoulders lifted briefly in a small shrug. Clyde backed up for a second at the response. “I wouldn’t do that you know…” he added. Tweek nodded mutely. “Say something.” Clyde whispered desperately.

“Something.” Tweek slurred. Clyde sighed as Craig walked back into the room with a mug of coffee for Tweek.

“Don’t patronize him, Clyde.” Craig growled.

“I’m not!”

Token set up the first movie and ordered a couple pizzas before they all settled down.

Clyde couldn’t stop staring at Tweek. It’s not as if Tweek noticed the attention, he was in a world of nothing, clearly. He was skinny - too skinny - ‘I drink coffee instead of eat’ skinny. His hair was a little shaggy, in need of a cut, _he’s probably scared of haircuts, his parents would have to dose him for that too_ Clyde cringed. His soft facial features which were normally scrunched up and twitching were serene… temporarily. When Clyde had been crouching next to him earlier, he could smell Harbucks all over Tweek, as if he had bathed in the espresso roast.

Two hours into the movie (Two hours into ‘Tweek watching’ for Clyde) Tweeks pills were wearing off somewhat, Clyde could see his jaw clench every now and then, and Tweeks eyes would dart around every few minutes. Tweeks deep blue eyes caught Clyde’s brown ones and stared for a moment. He didn’t jump or shout, like Clyde had expected, he stared back. Clyde flushed and looked toward the screen. When had they switched to _this_ movie?

Later that night (after watching about four movies and growing tired of watching), the barely-underage 19-20 year old boys excitedly passed around a bottle of liquor Token had fabricated out of seemingly nowhere. It was bitter and strong… “Can’t we pour this crap into something sweet?” Clyde whined.

“It’s not crap, it’s really expensive. My dad always drinks it straight.” Token laughed.

“You don’t make mixed drinks with scotch, Clyde.” Craig rolled his eyes. When the bottle came to Tweek he clapped a hand over his mouth and shook his head ‘no’ vigorously, mumbling something like ‘alcohol poisoning!’. “Come on, Tweek,” Craig pressed, “live a little.”

Tweek blushed and took the bottle timidly. He took a tentative drink and immediately coughed sending some of the golden liquid down his chin. “Gross! What the fuck?! Are you trying to kill me?!” Tweek shouted.

Token fell over in a fit of laughter. “Hey guys,” Token interjected suddenly, “if you could be anyone in the entire world, real or fictional, who would you be?”

“Stephen Hawking.” Craig said after thinking for a moment. “He just sits there all day and he gets all the ladies.” Everyone chuckled at this.

“If fictional is up for grabs, I’d want to be Batman.” Clyde shrugged, taking another sip of the bottle.

Craig’s rare half smile crept up in his moment of weakness, “you’re such a child, Clyde.” Clyde frowned at that.

“What about you, Tweek?” Token was smiling and laughing more and more as he got drunker.

“Uh, I don’t know… that’s too much pressure.” Tweek started winding his right hand into his hair.

“No pressure.” Craig drawled out, seemingly to the floor.

“I guess… uh… Craig!” Tweek had both hands tugging at his locks by this point.

“What, why?” Craig looked up towards Tweek.

“Because you’re all calm and stuff, I don’t know! Oh my god.” Craig started rubbing small circles on Tweek’s back, which seemed to make him calm down a little.

Anger bubbled up inside Clyde’s chest while he watched the interaction. Craig comforted Tweek all the time but it always made Clyde upset, he wasn’t entirely sure why, maybe because his best friend was good at calming Tweek but when Clyde was upset Craig told him to ‘suck it up, and stop being a baby’.

“Then I’d want to be Tweek, because being him must be like constantly being on a roller coaster!” Token fell onto the floor in a fit of laughter again.

“Ahhh! Roller coasters kill four people a YEAR!” Tweek shouted at Token. Everyone laughed at this outburst. “It’s a very REAL danger!” The boys continued to laugh.

* * *

Clyde arrived at the coffee shop earlier than usual the next morning. Coffee was sure to get rid of this headache. When the door opened and the bell chimed Tweek twitched violently. It must have been Pip’s day off, Tweek was standing behind the counter nervously… alone.

“Hey Tweek.” Clyde greeted warmly.

“Jesus! What do you want?!” Tweek replied, looking worried.

“That’s not a very nice way to greet customers.” Clyde laughed.

“Oh god! I’m sorry!” Tweek swayed back and forth on his feet, “What do you want me to make!?” He said to the counter. “Large caramel latte… extra sauce… whip… Unh… again?”

Clyde smiled back, “With an extra shot of espresso please.”

“Where’s Craig?” Tweek asked while writing sloppily all over Clyde’s cup.

“Probably sleeping off his hangover, why? Do you miss him?” Clyde’s eyes narrowed.

“Gah! No! You always come here together…” Tweek firmly applied the dome lid to Clyde’s sugary drink.

Clyde watched, as if in slow motion the drink slipped from Tweek’s shaky grasp and splattered all over the front of his Harbucks apron and the floor.

“AHHHH! No!” Tweek took a small step back and slipped in the puddle, landing unceremoniously on the floor with a SMACK.

“Tweek!” Clyde shouted, leaning as far over the counter as he could, “are you ok?”

“NO! I’m gonna die!” Clyde could swear he saw Tweeks pupils narrow on their own. He clutched at his chest and started breathing heavily.

“Stop breathing like that, you’re going to pass out.” Tweek didn’t seem to hear Clyde’s suggestion. Clyde climbed over the counter and kneeled down next to Tweek. _What would Craig do? WWCD haha… oh right Tweek…_ Clyde began to gently rub Tweek’s back until he was brought back to reality.

Tweek glanced around at the mess, “Oh god! I’ll make you another one!” he scrambled to his feet and pulled out another cup. The poor shaky boy was covered in coffee and whipped cream, “I’m such a failure!” Tweek silently chastised himself.

“You’re not a failure, Tweek.”

Tweek didn’t seem to hear him, or at least he was pretending not to have heard Clyde’s comment. After re-making Clyde’s sugary latte he erased the ‘87’ from the board and replaced it with a ‘0’ before mopping up the mess on the floor.

“Do you want to hang out later? Craig has a date tonight, it’s going to be the worst Saturday ever.” Tweek didn’t respond for a long time, as he continued cleaning up the mess he made.

Clyde thought Tweek was ignoring him and was about to leave before Tweek finally responded. “I guess so, but it’s not going to be very fun with just you and I…”

“Why not?” Clyde laughed.

Tweek looked up at Clyde confused as if the answer was obvious, “because I’m a weird loser…”

“Well… you are kind of weird, but I don’t think you’re a loser.”

“Who is Craig going on a date with?” Tweek looked upset, his eye twitching just a little bit.

“Jenny Simon.” Clyde shrugged. “Doesn’t matter, all the girls loooove Craig.” He rolled his eyes.

Tweek’s frown deepened. _If I didn’t know any better I’d say Tweek has a thing for Craig. Why does that make my chest hurt? Best friend jealousy again?_

“You don’t like Jenny?”

“I-I-I don’t know her very well…” Tweek stuttered, blushing.

_Tweek definitely has a thing for Craig. Maybe I should tell him… nah, Tweek would have a nervous breakdown._

“Well, tacos and Xbox if you’re interested?” Clyde gave Tweek a thumbs-up before leaving the shop.

“Tacos…” Tweek whispered to no one in particular as Clyde left the shop. _Craig’s going out with a girl tonight…_ His eyes became a little glassy but he began to busy himself with re-stocking cup lids. _Of course he was going on a date, he’s amazing…._

* * *

A knock on the door made Tweek jump so hard he splashed some of the coffee from his mug on the dining table. _Who …_ Tweek opened the door to a grinning Clyde, who was holding up a greasy bag from the taco hut. “Hungry?”

Tweek grunted in response. _What if the people at that taco place don’t wash their hands and the tacos were crawling with BACTERIA?!_ He took a deep breath and followed Clyde to his car, a beat up little Chevy from the 90s.

“What kind of video games do you like?” Clyde asked while buckling his seatbelt. He turned to look at Tweek who was fishing around in his bag for something. The distinct sound of pill bottles rattling around made Clyde wince. “What are you doing?”

“Uhhhhhh…” Tweek lifted two bottles up to read the fine print on them, “I have to take my….”

“Don’t” Clyde almost whispered. Tweek starred at him for a moment in disbelief.

“I can’t play video games without Klonopin, the gun noises make me faint.” He flushed in embarrassment.

“Then we’ll play something without gun noises, or we’ll mute the TV. If I wanted to hang out with a statue I’d go to a museum.” Clyde laughed, Tweek just starred.

“Are you sure… this is a lot of pressure…” he frowned and looked out the passenger window.

* * *

“I have the perfect all natural anxiety cure for you, Tweek.” Clyde was digging around in his nightstand drawer, Tweek was holding a controller starring at the main menu of dynasty warriors.

“All natural…” Tweek whispered to himself. “Supplements don’t work.”

“Not a supplement, an herb.” A small glass pipe was placed gently into Tweek’s hand.

“What’s this?” Tweek starred at the foreign object. “Will it make me sick? Is it poisonous?”

“Neither, it’ll make you calm, happy, and hungry.” Clyde took the pipe and showed Tweek how to use it.

“Isn’t this illegal? Won’t they ARREST US?!” Tweek gasped.

“Not if ‘they’ don’t find out.” Clyde grabbed one of the tacos from his greasy bag and ate half in one bite, lettuce falling onto his lap. Tweek cringed, _Messy.._.

Tweek experimentally took a small hit from the pipe in his hand, it made him feel … _sleepy._

Clyde handed Tweek a taco, Tweek poked at it like it was an unidentified object before pulling out some lettuce and tomato one piece at a time and bringing it to his lips. Clyde ginned at his friend’s picky eating habits. “Do you have any coffee?”

“Coffee and tacos is kind of a weird combo.”

“I am weird…” Tweek agreed. He was grasping his backpack full of pills and eyeing Clyde wearily. _Craig would get me some…._

“What? Why do you like Craig so much anyways….” Clyde frowned at Tweek. Tweek panicked, _Did I say that out loud?! Holy shit!_

“I-I-I don’t… not like… it’s just…. Pressure…” Tweeks face got redder with every word.

“Calm down, Tweek. It’s not like I’m going to tell him you keep checking out his ass.” Clyde grinned evilly.

“I DO NOT!” Tweek shouted in a panicked tone. “DON’T TELL HIM THAT!”

“I won’t,” Clyde laughed at Tweek’s telling outburst, “it’s not a big deal…”

Tweek’s next sentence was uttered in a fast chain of words “YES, it is a big deal! Because Craig will think I’m a gross pervert faggot with AIDS!”

Clyde lifted an eyebrow, “not all gay people are perverts with AIDS, Tweek.”

“Ug…” Tweek buried his face in his hands.

“I’ll get you your coffee, ok?” Clyde stood up and ruffled Tweek’s hair affectionately before heading down the stars. Clyde got the jealousy thing all backwards, he wasn’t jealous of Tweek for getting Craig’s attention (Although Clyde had had a few well-placed fantasies about Craig from time to time). He was jealous of Craig for having a ‘way’ with Tweek, who was absolutely the most interesting person Clyde knew.

* * *

Clyde never really thought too much about his sexuality, girls never interested him much but he wasn’t one to drool over men either. His fantasies would switch between actors and actresses and fictional characters, usually in some kind of bisexual orgy. He was _very_ creative, but had never even had the urge to so much as kiss anyone he’d ever met before… before now. He was currently servicing himself in the shower, as he did each morning, except this time he was having issues mustering up an image. He’d never had trouble before and he never needed porn with his active imagination. What finally popped into his head surprised him.

_“I need to take my medication” Tweek said in an uncharacteristically calm and seductive voice._

“Don’t” Clyde whispered to his shower wall, shutting his eyes tight.

 _Tweek swallowed the pill and became limp in a ridiculously quick manner. Clyde took advantage of his state, climbing over him. He did several unacceptable things to Tweek, including but not limited to Kissing his unresponsive mouth, grinding against him, undressing him, fondling him…_ Clyde came.

It was not a great orgasm because he immediately felt rather guilty for his thoughts going in that direction. If he _were_ ever to have the pleasure of fooling around with Tweek, he wouldn’t want to be taking advantage of him! _I hate his fucking medication!_ “What’s wrong with me?” He asked his reflection before brushing his teeth.

* * *

Tweek sighed warily as the line for coffee started to climb out the door. He hated weekend mornings! It was good that Pip was there or Tweek would surely have a nervous breakdown, scratch that, he might have one anyways. Pip had been slightly disappointed to see the ‘0’ on the white board this morning.

The line of cups in front of him was growing faster than he could make coffee so Pip was trying to man the register and make teas and black coffees at the same time while Tweek focused on the lattes.

“Espresso with ice.” Craig mumbled while looking at his phone. Tweek instantly calmed at the sound of Craig’s voice.

“Iced sweet tea?” Clyde said, placing his debit card on the counter.

Tweek began making the last customer’s vanilla latte so he could start on Craig’s quick espresso drink, while Pip ran over to shake up an iced tea. Clyde walked over to the serving counter where he could watch Tweek and grinned while the shaky boy fumbled with the cup lid. He glanced at Craig who was looking at him strangely, “What?”

“Dangerous territory.” He mumbled before returning his gaze to his phone.

“What is?” Clyde was genuinely confused.

“Small vanILLA LATTE!” Tweek shrieked nervously, placing the woman’s drink on the counter. The busty blonde with the mini skirt shuffled past the boys and grabbed her drink, quickly heading to the door; Craig turned to watch her leave.

Clyde climbed back into Craig’s car, shivering from the cold. Craig didn’t buckle up or start the car as quickly as usual. Clyde turned toward him with a raised eyebrow. “Do you think I’m stupid?”

“No, but I’m stupid, so please tell me what your damn problem is?” Clyde grumbled, shrinking under Craig’s intense gaze.

“You think I don’t know? I know you better than you know yourself. I saw the way you were looking at Tweek. Just, don’t even think about it.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Clyde looked out the window to avoid the other’s eyes.

“Clyde, Tweek is… clinically insane. The only reason he isn’t locked up is because his therapist doesn’t think he’s a danger to others. He can’t make decisions like…” Craig sighed and started the car.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Clyde repeated sadly. What Craig said was mean, it might have been a little true, but it was mean. “He’s an adult he can make decisions for himself…” He whispered.

Craig heard it, “Yeah, that’s why his mommy still takes care of him.” He scoffed. “Clyde, if you want to put your dick in Tweek… you’re kind of sick in the head.”

“I never said anything like that!” Clyde growled, unbuckling himself and storming out of the car and away from Craig’s house. He made a point to toss the last of his tea at the back of Craig’s car.

“Come on Clyde, I’m just trying to give you good advice!” Craig shouted at his friend’s retreating back.

“You called me crazy, you asshole!” Clyde retorted over his shoulder before picking up his pace.

“Sorry.” He heard faintly in the distance.

Clyde didn’t know where he was headed in his blind rage, but he found himself standing outside of Harbucks after his long walk. He entered, rubbing the cold from his face. Tweek and Pip were cleaning up after the morning rush, a few customers sat around sipping on their fancy beverages and eating coffee cakes.

“Hey Clyde, how can we help you today?” Pip was still his cheery self while sweeping the floor.

“Uh… something warm.” Clyde rubbed his numb hands together.

“Hot chocolate, hot tea, or coffee?” Pip asked.

“Hot chocolate, large.” Clyde moved closer to the counter where Tweek had begun making his drink.

“TWO FIFTY!” Tweek barked while pouring chocolate sauce into a cup. Pip had abandoned his broom to come ring Clyde up at the register.

“What happened to your tea?” Pip frowned.

“I threw it at Craig.” It was an over-exaggeration, but he was still a little angry at the assumption Craig had made. It might have been a little true, but it was still an assumption!

“Oh my GOD! WHY?!” Tweek asked, handing over the hot chocolate.

Clyde purposefully brushed his finger tips against Tweeks while taking the cup. Tweek jumped back at the touch. “He was being a dick…” Clyde looked down for a moment in thought. “Tweek, have you ever dated anyone?”

Tweek stood starring for a moment, in what seemed like shock at the question, “Of course not!”

“What do you mean ‘of course not?’”

“Who in their right MIND would want to date ME?!” Tweek smoothed out the front of his apron nervously. He looked sad at the implication, it made Clyde feel bad for asking.

“I’ve never dated, do you think there’s something wrong with me too?”

“GOD NO!” Tweek shook his head ‘no’ violently, “You could probably date anyone you WANT!”

“Heh…” Clyde blushed. Pip was busying himself with the food display, just out of ear reach, _good._ “Do you want to date?”

Tweek looked at the ground dejectedly, “Does it matter?” It was a small voice Clyde had never really heard come out of Tweek.

“Do you want to go out sometime?” Clyde added, cautiously.

“With YOU?” Tweek’s eye twitched. “Ok…” His hands had a vice grip on his apron. “Oh god! What do you want me to _be like_?”

“What?” Clyde scrunched his nose up trying to think about the question. “Like… you.”

“You don’t like it when I take pills…” It was a statement, not a question. He was still wringing his hands in the apron which was littered with wrinkles, and he was grinding his teeth a little bit.

“I’ll text you.” Clyde mentioned before nervously escaping the shop.

* * *

“Just… yeah just like that.” Clyde groaned.

“HARDER!” Tweek shouted.

Clyde grunted.

Tweek was breathing heavy.

**SMACK**

“OUCH! MY ASS!” Tweek’s leg had been stuck in a grate in the street, Clyde had successfully freed him but Tweek had landed ass first on the cement. This date was turning out to be a disaster… as Craig thought it would. Fuck _, Craig is not right! Tweek is fully capable of this shit!_

Clyde lifted his jittery date off the street. “It was ok, right?” Clyde asked as they approached Tweek’s front door.

“Thanks for the coffee.” Tweek was pulling at his collar like he couldn’t breathe.

“No problem, I like hanging out with you.” Clyde said, lamely.

“You DO?” Tweek’s eyes were wide. They were both silent for a long time, Clyde had expected Tweek to run into his house as if he’d been kidnapped, but they were both standing there like idiots.

 _Does he expect me to kiss him?_ Clyde was so nervous he thought this must be what Tweek feels like on a regular basis, a nervous wreck. He leaned forward a little bit. Tweek’s eyes widened, but he didn’t pull away. Clyde closed the remaining distance and placed a innocent kiss on Tweek’s mouth.

“Th-th-thanks.” Tweek backed up one step then turned and walked right into the close front door. “OW! FUCK!” Clyde couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped him. Tweek smiled back crookedly before turning the door knob successfully and disappearing. _Is it wrong for me to think everything he does is cute?_

* * *

Tweek flew into his bathroom and began scrubbing at his face aggressively, even going so far as to lick his bar of hand soap and stick his face under the tap. _Mouths are gross, GROSS! Bacteria! NO!_ Don’t get the wrong idea; Tweek had been pleased with the kiss, delighted even! He never thought anyone would _ever ever_ want to kiss him, especially not a popular and good-looking guy like Clyde.

“I can handle this… I can handle this… I can handle this.” Tweek repeated over and over to his reflection, which had raw red lips from the vigorous washing. Tweek wanted nothing more than to be normal like his peers but his damaged mind was a barrier from his normality. Tweek’s fingers fumbled in his medicine cabinet, knocking over some pill bottles and bath products. Tweek didn’t always take a sedative, they made him nauseous and his doctor said he could become dependent, but his hands were shaking more than usual. _I hope I said the right thing! Thanks? What the hell was that? Dating is waaaay too much pressure._ He was barely able to get the pill into his mouth, his hands and neck were occasionally jerking in an over-exaggerated way.

 _Sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep…_ If Tweek didn’t repeat the mantra in his head he would think too much and never get to sleep, sedative or not. His eyes shot open, the shaking had stopped as the pill started to take effect but Tweeks mind was already racing. _What do I do? What do I say? I’m going to have a heart attack next time I see him! The pressure is maddening. My parents would be so mad if they knew… My therapist would tell me not to do it… Why can’t I have what everyone else has? Why can’t I be happy like everyone else? Sleep sleep sleep sleep…_ Tweek shut his eyes as tight as was humanly possible ghosting his fingers across his sore lips for the hundredth time.

* * *

Clyde was cheerful as he awoke the next morning, he thought it had gone rather well the previous night. If it had been anyone else Clyde would have been angry at the response to his kiss, but he was just glad Tweek didn’t push him away and scream in his face. Likely Craig would try to stop this, to squash this cancerous relationship like a bug. It’s not like he would tell Craig, but Craig could see right through Clyde like a window.

Craig picked Clyde up as usual and they headed over to grab their morning coffee. “Sorry about yesterday, I was just concerned. What’s got you all rainbows and sunshine?” Craig mumbled sleepily at his smiling friend.

“Uh, nothing.” Clyde looked around nervously, at anything _but_ his best friend.

“mmhmm, sure.” Craig growled. They arrived at Harbucks before the rush and quickly took their place in line. “large black coffee, dark roast.” Craig said to Pip, rubbing his eyes.

“One of those hot chocolate things again… large.” Clyde added behind him.

“Again?” Craig asked quietly before he was interrupted by pip.

“You liked it?” Pip exclaimed happily, “We love to please our customers!” _What a melvin…_

“Then I’ll take one hand-job.” Craig deadpanned. Everyone looked at him strangely (especially Pip) before he let out a trickle of laughter. Clyde could feel Craig’s burning hellfire eyes darting between himself and Tweek suspiciously. Tweek was being his usual jumpy self… but he was blushing. Hardcore blushing and he couldn’t keep his eyes off Clyde. _Damint, here it comes…_

“Eveything ok, Tweek?” Craig asked, glaring daggers at the shaking barista.

“Y-yeah…” He was still starring directly at Clyde, he didn’t even glance at Craig when he answered him. Craig’s evil glare turned to Clyde who was visibly nervous. _Fuck! He knows…_

“What?!” Clyde interjected, crossing his arms over his chest in defense. It only proved to make him look guiltier than before.

“What happened?” Craig’s gaze was sure to send laser beams his way any moment.

“Nothing!” Clyde was visibly shaken by his friend’s look.

“Hey, Clyde. Th-thank you for taking me…” Tweek was going to spill, he’d never mentioned it was a secret. Clyde waved at him frantically trying to stop him from finishing his sentence. Tweek was oblivious, “…for the coffee last night. It was nice… GAH! My ass still hurts though.” Pip dropped a tea all over the floor, his first ever drop. Craig’s jaw fell open and his eyes widened. Clyde had never seen Craig make that expression _ever._ “I FELL DOWN!” Tweek added, exasperated by the obvious assumption. Tweek tugged at his hair, nervous from the embarrassment. He had to _think_ of what he was going to say before he said it.

“You actually did it, You dated Tweek, even though I told you not to.” Craig said with no emotion as they left the shop.

“You’re not my mother…” Clyde growled. “I know. Just… be careful, take it slow… don’t take advantage of him.”

“I would never do that!” Clyde stopped and turned toward his friend. He felt a wave of guilt when he thought of his fantasy the other day where he was doing exactly that

“I didn’t know you were a fag, but I guess it makes sense.” Clyde punched Craig in the arm for the comment and stormed off towards the car. “Ow! Fuck you!” Craig laughed, chasing after Clyde.

Craig shouldered his friend against the icy car in revenge before running away quickly over to the driver’s side. Craig was fully aware that Clyde could probably kick his ass physically, but luckily Craig’s demeanor had kept people thinking he was really tough. He climbed into his seat for ‘safety’ but Clyde climbed into the passenger side and reached over to smack Craig upside the head and punch him in the arm again. “Help! Rape!” Craig shouted playfully.

* * *

The first time Clyde heard from Tweek after their first date was via text message. Tweek had sent him the most difficult-to-read message he had a rough time deciphering it. He assumed it was difficult for the spastic boy to hit the keys in the correct order, thank god he didn’t use autocorrect!

Tweek: ehat r u dping

Clyde stared at the screen for a few long minutes before he decided it said ‘what are you doing?’

Clyde: Model Airplane.

(Clyde included a picture of his half-finished plane with the text)

Tweek: Holy sht u r genioys

 _Genioys? Genius?_ Clyde chuckled before hitting the call button; surely he would understand Tweek’s screams better than his texts.

“WHAT?!” Tweek answered.

“You texted me, I thought you wanted to talk?” Clyde said casually, laying back on his bed.

“I was just wondering if … like… maybe you want to get coffee again? I mean with ME? ORNOTWHATEVER… Your plane is really COOL!” His voice got louder with each word spoken.

“Yeah, sure.” Clyde answered casually.

“Holy shit! Ok…” Tweek hung up on him without asking a time or saying goodbye. Clyde starred at his phone, he shrugged. _Whatever._

* * *

This coffee ‘date’ went better than the previous one. Tweek had knocked over his own coffee with a particularly violent twitch but Clyde had simply cleaned up and bought him another one. They avoided the street grates on the way to Tweek’s house so there would be no sore asses involved. Everything was going swimmingly.

 

 

They stopped at Tweek’s door and stood face to face. Clyde had a deja-vu moment about their first kiss, which hadn’t been spectacular but it had been _nice._ “I know I didn’t ask last time, but I thought it might be polite. Do you want me to kiss you?” Clyde asked, much less nervous this time.

Tweek cocked his head to one side and raised an eyebrow looking at Clyde, confused. “Do I want…” Tweek looked around his porch, not that it was interesting. “If _you_ want to… no pressure….” That small voice came out again, the one Clyde had only heard when he’d embarrassed Tweek, asking about his love life. Ah, he understood now; embarrassment could easily over-take the nervous jitters for a moment. He liked learning these things about Tweek.

Clyde didn’t answer, he stepped forward and bravely grabbed the back of Tweek’s neck bringing them gently together for their second kiss. It was slower, it was slightly more open, it was comfortable… for Clyde at least. Tweek started to gently place pressure against Clyde’s chest, trying to ease him away. When Tweek finally pulled them apart a few inches, Clyde was still gripping Tweek’s neck and waist, he was looking into those large glassy eyes.

“Th-th.” Tweek started, but he was more nervous than ever.

“Thanks?” Clyde finished for him, grinning at the smaller boy. Tweek smiled and placed his hand on his front door knob.

“Yeah, thanks.” Tweek said in an uncharacteristically calm voice before opening his door.

* * *

It was all an act, because he liked Clyde _so much._ He was panicking! He’d been panicking since the first claustrophobic rush he got when that hand trapped his fragile neck in a vice grip and his mouth had been exposed to even more Clyde germs this time! Clyde almost put his tongue in there! _HOLY SHIT!_ Tweek started to bat at his face uncontrollably, running into the kitchen and splashingwater all over his head, scrubbing at his neck, his face, his tongue, EVERYTHING! Mrs. Tweak walked into this kitchen to find her son scrambling and shaking harder than usual. “Darling, calm down.” She tried to wrap her arms around the squirming boy but he jerked out of her grasp smacking his elbow on the counter. He fell to the floor and whined miserably.

It was happening again, it had been happening more and more. Mrs. Tweak kneeled down and called up the stairs for her husband. Tweek kicked her face just enough for her to taste blood. Bracing Tweek’s flailing legs with both of her small hands she tried not to cry. He was getting bigger and his ‘moments’ hurt a lot more now, she would need her husband’s help. “Shhh baby, shhhh.” She stroked the side of his face, he tried to bite her, his eyes were wild.

Mr. Tweak finally descended into the kitchen, a syringe in his teeth. He grabbed Tweek’s dangerous limbs while his wife grabbed the syringe out of his mouth, she gently pushed the solution into Tweek. After a long two minutes of fighting the boy had become increasingly limp until he passed out in Mr. Tweak’s arms.

“This is the last straw.” Mr. Tweak grumbled. “We’re going to tell the doctor this time.”

“Nooooo!” She wailed, clutching at the sedated boy. “My baby.” She sobbed, but she knew it was for the best. Tweek was a danger to everyone, including the nice boy he worked with, and his friends. Mr. Tweak would call the doctor the next morning. His wife had so many bruises from the child, they couldn’t handle him anymore. He would have to tell the doctor that his son… had increasingly become violent.

* * *

Tweek woke up in his bed not knowing how he got there. The last thing he remembered he’d been kissing Clyde on his front porch. Several places were sore, his elbow, his ankles, his knees, and that spot his mom uses to stick needles in his veins.

“Noooo.” He whispered to the ceiling. He could feel the drugs they’d pumped into him a few hours earlier and his limbs felt like they weighed more than usual. He glanced at the clock on his nightstand, it was two in the morning. He squinted his eyes shut for a tick before dragging himself into the sitting position. _Coffee, I need some coffee…_

He carefully trudged down stairs, his legs feeling like jelly. His stomach turned, his head hurt, and he was thirsty… so thirsty.

The kitchen light was already on, which was strange for this time of night. His mother was sitting at the kitchen table, reading a book and sobbing. The book was a blue paperback ‘Schizophrenia: Innovations in Diagnosis and Treatment’ by Colin A. Ross, MD. His thumb twitched nervously against the side of his pants as he watched his mother silently. She had a small cut on her jaw surrounded by a large purple bruise. Tweek’s eyes glassed up at the sight, _it was me wasn’t it? I hurt her…._

“Mom?” His voice was cracked and worn out. She turned her head at his voice, looking startled.

“Darling.” She smiled warmly, “did you sleep well?”

“I … don’t remember.” Tweek stared at her without blinking for a long time which gave her enough discomfort to turn away.

“How would you like to go to a fun camp, Tweek?” She said it brightly but her voice broke in sadness.

“Camp?” He was worried; she’d used the same words when he was ten, when they sent him to rehabilitation where he came out with more pill bottles than he could hold in both hands.

“Yes, they have all kinds of fun activities.” She continued. “Like art, and sports, and … people you can talk to… other people … like you.” She frowned.

“Like me?” A tear fell down his cheek, his mother rushed over to the coffee pot to pour him a drink and pressed the hot mug into his hands. She gently molded his hands around the cup so he wouldn’t drop it, and wiped his tear away. She was so perfect, so loving, so … going to send him to the looney farm.

“Here…” She led him over to the table where a pamphlet lay spread open. ‘North Park psychological rehabilitation center’, it showed pictures of normal happy people painting and playing outside. That’s not what it was really like, it was just a way to make crazies feel more comfortable with being sent there.

Tweek took a shaky sip of the hot beverage and set it on the table. He squeezed his eyes shut which released a few more tears down his cheeks. “No.” He said in a small voice, shaking his head negatively. “PLEASE DON’T TAKE ME THERE! PLEASE MOMMY…” He was crying harder now, clutching at his mother’s nightgown. “I need you…” She flung her arms around him and squeezed him tight.

“We’ll ask your doctor if there are any other options tomorrow. Please don’t be mad at me, Tweek. I love you so much!” She was crying with him now.

“I wont… hurt you again, I PROMISE!” He cried pathetically against her.

Mrs. Tweak sighed at her husband who had just walked into the kitchen to see the scene. Tweek’s cries had woken him up, he rubbed sleepily at his eyes.

“There’s an appointment for you today, boy.” His father said, glancing at the papers on the table. “Dr. Murphy is looking forward to seeing you again.”

“Dr. Murphy?! No!” Tweek had thought his mother had been talking about his primary care physician, not the doctor who wanted to drug him into a stupor. Dr. Murphy was his psychologist and he always treated Tweek like an interesting _animal_. He talked about him like he wasn’t there, he talked to Tweek like he was a baby or stupid or something. He ran upstairs to his room after grabbing his coffee, when he arrived he collapsed on his bed and started tearing at his hair until it hurt. _Sweet pain, sweet sweet pain, take me away from this tyranny!_ It always worked to make him forget what he had been upset about in the first place.

Tweek quickly checked his closet for gnomes, locked his window, turned his light switch off and on three times, and crawled back into bed.

* * *

Tweek was now sitting in front of Dr. Murphy, fear written all over his face. “Ok, Tweek,” he started in his talking-to-a-baby voice, “you have two choices.” He held up two fingers for emphasis. “You can go to North Park rehabilitation for at least a year _or_ your medication needs to be increased and mandatorily administered by your parents.” He glanced at Mrs. Tweak, probably thinking Tweek didn’t understand his words. He continued his speech in Tweek’s mother’s direction. “And he’ll need soft straps at home while he’s sleeping, or rather while you two are sleeping. He needs to be monitored at all times if he stays home.”

“Y-you don’t TRUST me anymore?!” Tweek wound his fists into his hair. Dr. Murphy gently removed the grasping hands from Tweek’s locks.

“It’s not a matter of trust, Tweek.” He said softly, “we want what’s best for your wellbeing.” His smile made Tweek sick to his stomach. Tweek felt his cell phone buzz in his pocket, it scared him and made him jump to standing position “GAH!” before sitting down again. He discreetly checked the screen, it was Clyde texting.

Clyde: Hey Tweek, what are you doing today? You weren’t at the coffee shop….

Tweek frowned and pocketed the phone without answering. As if on queue; Dr. Murphy continued, “He’s going to have to quit that barista job, there’s too many weapons to grab and you have to keep in mind his co-worker’s safety. Bagging groceries might be a better role if he wants to work.”

“I LIKE being a barista, I’m GOOD at it! They don’t keep weapons behind the counter, I’ve never seen one! Grrrr.” He grabbed at his hair again.

He was answering Tweek’s question in his mother’s direction again, _how infuriating!_ “Hot water, butter knives, spoons, and forks. The oven, the parts of the machines…”

“I’m not going to stab Pip with a spoon, DAMNIT!” His mother looked concerned at the list of potential weapons.

Tweek’s pocket buzzed again, he jumped again “GAH!”. It was Clyde again…

Clyde: Call me when you get this…

Clyde: Miss you a little… Is that lame?

Tweek: I miss u 2

Clyde: Where are you? Do you want to hang out?

Tweek: m at doc – will cll later…

Tweek saw out the corner of his eye, the doctor was handing new prescriptions to him mother. “This one give him two four times daily, this one twice daily, this one twice daily….” Tweek zoned out for a couple minutes before his mother approached him. She was holding some prescription samples and a glass of water.

“Ok honey, go ahead and take these, don’t worry everything will be fine.” She deposited the four colorful pills into Tweek’s hand.

“What if I DIE?!” He shouted at his hand.

“Everything will be fine.” She patted his hair and he threw the pills into his mouth, chugging them all down at once. _Anything to stay with mom…_

* * *

Clyde was sitting at a table at Harbucks, but Tweek hadn’t come to work today. Pip looked frantic working alone. ‘Doc’, Clyde clutched at his phone but didn’t reply quickly. He had to think, Tweek probably had a lot of different doctors so it was stupid to worry, right?

Clyde: Everything ok?

He didn’t get an answer for over ten minutes so he shoved his phone in his pocket and left the shop. He would wait by Tweek’s driveway until he got home from his appointment. Maybe he would take him somewhere nicer than out for coffee… he couldn’t stop thinking about him, especially when Craig was too busy to distract him.

When the Tweak’s car pulled into the driveway Clyde sprung to his feet to greet his… boyfriend? The blonde’s parents climbed out of the car, but Tweek hadn’t even moved since they pulled up. Mr. Tweek gave Clyde a quick questioning glance before opening his son’s door. Tweek nearly spilled out of the backseat, but his father caught him on his decent. Clyde glowered at them, they’d drugged him up for something…

“Hey, I was wondering if I could take Tweek out for lunch?” He suggested casually. Both parents stopped and stared at him like he had two heads.

“Why?” His father asked.

“Stop it darling, it’s good that Tweek has some friends!” She said cheerily. “Tweek can’t go out today but you can come inside? Would you like some coffee…?”

“Clyde.” He introduced himself. He nodded and followed the family into the house, never taking his eyes off of Tweeks lethargic form.

“So Clyde, can we get you a cup of fresh ground coffee from the mountains of Peru? The kind of coffee that’ll clear your senses, and warm your heart? The perfect way to start your morning.” Mr. Tweak asked Clyde with a marketable grin.

Clyde blinked. “Uh… sure.”

“Cream and sugar?” Mrs. Tweak sang from the kitchen.

“Yes please.” He said back, before plopping down on the couch next to Tweek… or the human shaped house plant, he wasn’t sure yet…

Mrs. Tweak emerged from the kitchen with two fresh cups of coffee. She handed the first one to Clyde and grabbed Tweek’s hands to wrap them gently around the other mug.

“Is he ok?” Clyde asked her, glancing at Tweek from the corner of his eye.

“Oh, yes. New medication, he’ll have to get used to it! But it does make him ever so pleasant” Her voice sounded too damn cheery for that sentence.

Clyde looked at Tweek who was staring open mouthed at the blank TV screen, a thin line of drool running down his chin. “Pleasant?” He looked up and she was gone.

“Don’t hesitate to call us down if anything goes awry.” Mr. Tweak said, ascending the stairs two at a time.

“Awry?” Clyde scrunched his nose up. “Tweek?” He tapped the other boy on the shoulder. Tweek’s head turned toward him slowly. It was very _zombie like_ and it creeped Clyde out.

“Clyyyyde.” He answered in a slurred and unemotional way. Clyde reached up and wiped the drool from Tweek’s chin with his sleeve.

“I missed you…” Clyde repeated his earlier text in a low voice.

“mmmm tooo…” Tweek almost slid off the couch but Clyde grabbed him and propped him back up.

“Pip doesn’t make coffee as good as you.” Clyde’s chest was starting to hurt. He missed the rushed responses and over exaggerated reactions Tweek was known for.  

Clyde felt tears stinging at his eyes, he’d hoped to see his object of affection being animated today. He grabbed the smaller boy in a tight hug and wiped his eyes on Tweek’s shoulder. “How long until it wears off?” He whispered more to himself than to Tweek.

“bathroom.” Tweek whispered. Clyde pulled away and watched as Tweek struggled to stand and walked to the bathroom, falling against the wall occasionally. Clyde followed just to make sure he was alright. The dorr closed, Clyde remained standing in the hall. He gasped when he heard a gagging noise _Oh god, what if he’s hanging himself in utter apathy!?_ Clyde yanked at the door handle and flew into the bathroom. Tweek was crouched over the toilet… sticking his fingers in his throat, throwing up on his hand… Clyde grabbed at his stomach which was churning at the sight.

“Stop it! What the fuck?!” he scrunched his eyes shut and kneeled down to tug on Tweek’s shoulders. He’d accidently got a glance at Tweek’s toilet deposit. No food, just coffee and multi colored pills, lots of them.

Tweek grabbed a piece of toilet paper and wiped furiously at his mouth. “Sorry!” He muttered. “I could’t…” Tweek was crying suddenly, and Clyde felt like puking himself.

“It’s ok…” He rubbed Tweek’s shoulders comfortingly.

“Don’t tell my mom…” He sobbed.

“I wont.” Clyde gathered Tweek into his arms, still sitting on the bathroom floor, he reached over and flushed the toilet to rid of the evidence. “Wash your hands.” Clyde demanded, lifting Tweek to a standing position.

“I just want to be me…” Tweek mumbled at his soapy hands.

“I understand…” Clyde frowned at his reflection.

Tweek looked up and caught Clyde’s eyes in the bathroom mirror, “You’re the only one who doesn’t want me to disappear.” His expression was heartbreaking.

_Is that what the pills felt like? Like he was disappearing?_

* * *

Tweek and Clyde settled back onto the couch, Clyde was still worrying about what had just taken place but he was glad the residual medicine was wearing off. When Tweek’s parents came down to check on him Tweek did his best at pretending he was still under the influence, staring at his lap and staying as still as possible. They asked if Clyde was _okay_ and retreated upstairs when they were satisfied. Clyde wondered why they would ask such a thing, he _knew_ Tweek was harmless.

Clyde leaned down and kissed Tweek on his cheek, Tweek jumped away, alarmed, before smiling in Clyde’s direction. “Why don’t y-you hate me like everyone else?”

“Everyone doesn’t hate you!” Clyde argued.

“My doctor is in the C.I.A, man! He’s trying to poison me, someone told him to POISON ME! What if it was my parents because they’re sick of me and they want me DEAD?” Tweek crossed his arms and started rocking back and forth. “…they’re going to tie me to my bed! This is way too much pressure, man!”

“Who is?”

“Maybe they want to kill me…”

“Your parents love you. No one wants to kill you.” Tweek looked at Clyde with wide eyes.

“How can you be sure?” Tweek whispered in a panicked tone. “My mom gave me cyanide pills! She’s plotting against me with Dr. Murphy…” He clutched at his hair.

“They weren’t cyanide.” Clyde laughed, rubbing the anxious boy’s back.

“Tweek?” His dad’s voice came from the top of the stairs, “is everything ok?”

“Gah! I’m fine, dad!”

“How mad would they be if you left?” Clyde grinned. _This_ was not the day he’d planned for them.

“Pissed! They’d be _so_ pissed.” Tweek hissed through his teeth.

“Come on.” Clyde grabbed Tweek’s hand and led them to the front door.

“GAH!”

“They won’t even notice if they can’t hear you.” Clyde whispered, gently opening the front door.

“Yes they will! They’ll send me to a nuthouse!” Tweek pleaded, resisting slightly.

“It’ll be fun!” Clyde smiled charmingly at the shaky boy. Tweek calmed slightly and smiled back.

“O-ok.”

* * *

Clyde walked Tweek toward the frozen lake after a brief stop at his house. His current and older smaller pair of ice skates were dangling from his fingertips.

“I’m not very good at ice skating!” Tweek had said, alarmed.

“I’ll hold you up.” Clyde had assured him.

“What if I fall and crack my head open and BLEED ALL OVER THE ICE?!” Tweek asked, tugging on his hair as Clyde laced his skates for him.

“I told you, I’ll hold you up. I wouldn’t let that happen.” Clyde tried to imply trust though his eyes.

As soon as Clyde placed Tweek at the lake’s edge the blonde pulled away, trying to break free from Clyde’s grasp to run away. “I’ve got you.” He guaranteed.

Tweek finally got up the nerve to let his feet hit the ice, all the while clutching onto Clyde for dear life. Clyde was very good at ice skating, it was a regular weekend activity that he and Craig had enjoyed as children. As soon as Tweek calmed down from just _standing there,_ Clyde grabbed onto the smaller boy’s hips and slid backwards on his skates smoothly, pulling the other along with him. “OH MY GOD!” Tweek’s grip got stronger and he huddled against Clyde’s chest in fear, almost slipping down to the ice. Lucky for Tweek Clyde was very strong and held them steady.

Tweek wasn’t used to all this cold wind whipping by so fast, nor the control loss on his feet. His torso was filled with panic and he longed for solid ground, however Clyde’s firm grip was reassuring. A bird whizzed by them almost pelting Tweek in the head “Ahhhhh! Spys!” and he’d nearly thrown them both down to the ice but Clyde held steady.

“Shhhh.” Clyde said soothingly, Tweek visibly calmed again, staring into Clyde’s eyes longingly. Clyde caught the expression and pulled Tweek’s face closer to his own. “Everything’s ok, you’re safe with me.” He closed the distance and placed a kiss on the corner of Tweek’s mouth. Tweek bravely returned the peck on the corner of Clyde’s mouth and smiled. Clyde could feel the other boy relax in his arms and he was elated.

Kenny McCormick stood at the edge of the lake, leaning on a tree. Kenny valued having a coffee and cigarette by the lake on his lunch break. He’d witnessed the entire exchange, although neither of the other boys had seen him, they were distracted by each other. Kenny was worried for Tweek and sad for Clyde, this would only end in disaster. There had been a short time in high school that Kenny had gotten too enamored with Tweek, they hadn’t labeled it but Kenny would kiss Tweek sometimes and they would hold each other in a more-than-friends kind of way. He knew exactly how Clyde felt, the blamelessness and intrigue of not knowing what Tweek really was… after all, Tweek’s parents had always said “It’s just his ADD…” but it wasn’t.

Kenny remembered it like it was yesterday; he and Tweek had been kind-of involved for a few weeks and Tweek had started calming around him more than usual. He thought he could cure him, he thought he could protect him. It had gone too far when their private make-out sessions had become more heated, Tweek had stopped being so scared and wasn’t pulling away. They were both weird and broken and so perfect for each other. Tweek had told Kenny he loved him, Kenny had said it back. The calmer boy had tried to touch Tweek intimately, and that was when all hell had broken loose…

He watched the two boys happily skating to Clyde’s motions; Clyde had always been the best at skating in their class. _He could be a hockey player_ Craig had declared excitedly when they were all still kids.

…When Kenny had taken it too far, when he’d tried to pleasure the other boy, he had just ever-so-gently stuck his fingers in the front of Tweek’s pants… Tweek turned into something else, something scary. He’d gotten a terrifying look in his eyes; he wasn’t acknowledging the words Kenny was saying or his soothing gestures, and definitely not his pleading for forgiveness. Tweek had struck Kenny three times while he was thrashing wildly. The first was on Kenny’s wrist with his still shoe-clad foot, Kenny had heard the sickening bone crunch under the assault and had fallen off of Tweek’s bed in shock. Another foot came out of nowhere hitting Kenny in the forehead, knocking him completely on his back. He could hear the Tweaks running up the stairs; they’d heard Kenny hit the floor. The third wound was to his heart when Tweek looked him right in the eye and yelled, “HELP! RAPE!”. Kenny had cried like a bitch.

Kenny had told his parent’s he’d gotten into a fight; he’d had to get a cast on his wrist and he didn’t talk to Tweek for a month. Tweek’s parents hadn’t questioned Kenny about the words Tweek had yelled as they were opening the door, they merely apologized to him and said they’d cover any medical bill costs. “Get a room.” He growled angrily at the two boys who whipped around to look at the offending voice. Tweek almost slipped out of Clyde’s grasp “Wah!!” but Clyde held on tighter.

“Ken….” Tweek whispered fearfully.

“Aren’t you supposed to be at work?” Clyde growled at the intruder.

“Lunch.” Kenny grunted in response. “Sorry, did I _interrupt_ something?”

“As a matter of fact…”

Tweek always had mixed feelings in seeing Kenny, he was happy because no one made him feel the way Kenny used to… except Clyde who was getting pretty close. He was always happy to see Kenny… but the other boy didn’t smile at him anymore, not since the _episode._ Tweek only remembered that they had been having the best time he’d ever had and he wanted to stay like that forever, Kenny had told him he loved him and he’d never been so happy in his life. He thought he was too cracked and no one would ever love him. Next thing he knew he was waking up, groggy from the sedative and at school Kenny was a mess and wouldn’t even look at him! Tweek’s eyes got teary at the thought, as if Kenny was still channeling that anger toward him and he could never take it back. Kenny still had never told him what happened, he just said ‘forget it’… Kenny _had_ told Craig, because Tweek and Craig had always been close and he just wanted to make sure _someone_ was keeping an eye on the crazy boy. He supposed he should tell Clyde as well…

* * *

Tweek’s parents _were_ angry when Clyde brought him home, but they were glad to see both boys in good condition, albeit some red frozen cheeks. His mother immediately pressed a hand full of pills into Tweek’s palm and urged him to take them right away, it was past the deadline.

Mr. Tweak gestured ‘shoo’ to Clyde who retreaded out the door, leaving his boyfriend in his parent’s hands. “Hey!” Clyde spun on his heels to look at Kenny who was suddenly standing at the bottom of the Tweak’s walkway. “I need to talk to you.” He narrowed his eyes at the other boy who was staring at him stupidly.

“What?” Clyde hissed, beginning the walk towards his own house.

Kenny followed, “You know… Tweek and I used to be kind of an item.”

“So?!” Clyde growled and started walking faster.

“So, that was a long time ago… but he ended up beating the shit out of me…bad.” Clyde stopped and turned towards Kenny, curious. “…That’s why we broke up. I just wanted to let you know that if you go too far past his comfort zone… he can be really feisty.” The image of Tweek’s mother’s facial bruise popped into his head, he’d been too nice to inquire about it.

“What ‘comfort zone’ did you breach?” Clyde was really curious, although the thought of Tweek with Kenny was making him maddeningly jealous.

“Second base.” Kenny shrugged. “And don’t… kiss him with too much tongue it makes him all germaphobic… yeah.” Kenny sighed and started backing away, “I know that was like three years ago… but who knows what it’d be like now… he’s stronger.” He finished sadly. Clyde realized Kenny may have still had some feelings for Tweek which was infuriating.

* * *

Tweek lay on his bed, feeling the calming, nauseating, dizzying effects of his latest pill cocktail. He stared up at the ceiling. Seeing Kenny had mustered up some painful feelings he’d buried a long time ago. His eyes got watery as images flashed though his sedated mind. Kenny’s long fingers wrapping his smaller digits into a comfortable hand-hold, Kenny’s gentle kisses to his temple, Kenny’s crazy stories, the way he agreed with every strange fucked up thing Tweek said, the way Kenny had told him ‘ _I’ll never love anyone as much as I love you’._ He’d fucked it all up, and he would probably fuck it up with Clyde too…

Tweeks father suddenly came into the room, he didn’t say anything nor did he look Tweek in the eye. He simply strolled over to Tweek’s bed and began securing the soft straps they’d installed on his bed to Tweek’s wrists and ankles. He leaned over and placed a small kiss on the boy’s forehead. “Goodnight, son.” He’d sounded really frustrated. His parents were good people, he wished they’d had another child so they weren’t stuck with only him, he was _damaged._

* * *

Tweek was allowed to man the coffee shop with his mother watching his every move, but he was so glad to be there again after the long weekend. He loved the smell of this place, he loved the customers, and he even tried to enjoy Pip’s company.

Craig and Clyde strolled through the shop like clockwork, Clyde’s eyes lit up when he saw Tweek behind the counter, Craig gave a calm wave without looking up from his cell phone. They ordered their usual drinks which Tweek was already busy making before they’d even gotten to the counter and paid.

What’s your _mom_ doing here?” Clyde asked quietly, leaning over the counter.

“It’s a stipulation.” Clyde could see the lifeless look in Tweek’s eyes. He usually didn’t take any meds for work, but he sure was on them right now. Craig elbowed Clyde in the ribs to get his attention. Clyde turned and Craig nodded at Jenny, who was sitting at a table in her little mini skirt. Clyde nodded and Craig quickly marched over to the pretty girl.

“We should go skating again some time.” Clyde suggested.

“I can’t do that.” Tweek looked at him with his cold-lifeless eyes, like the dilated black eyes of a stuffed bear.

“Why?”

“I’m not supposed to leave the house without supervision.”

“You’re an adult!” Clyde hissed at him. Mrs. Tweek made a little gasping noise, her eyes fixed on the door. Kenny walked in, Clyde could tell by the look in the woman’s eyes that she knew about the violent outburst Tweek had inflicted toward this man.

“Small black coffee.” Kenny said, dropping a handful of change on the counter. Kenny was staring intently at Tweek, who was gaping back at him. Clyde had lost the blonde’s attention to the newly arrived individual. Kenny drummed out the beginning of a little tune on the counter with his knuckles and Tweek finished the last two notes with the stir stick in his hand against the coffee machine. Kenny laughed and Tweek handed him the cup of plain coffee smiling awkwardly. Kenny reached with both hands, one gripping the coffe and the other gently squeezing Tweek’s elbow, Tweek didn’t startle at the touch, he blushed.

“How _are_ you, Kenny?” Mrs. Tweak interrupted the silent conversation.

“Fine thanks.” He grinned at the woman.

Clyde was fuming, gripping his drink so hard a little bit of liquid poured onto his fist. He was left ignored so he retreated from the shop, leaving Craig to his girlfriend.

Tweek glanced toward the spot Clyde had been standing it, it was now empty. He’d never answered him, Kenny had distracted Tweek before he could…

* * *

“So…” Clyde and Tweek were sitting on Tweek’s couch watching CNN, because that’s what ‘catatonic’ Tweek had turned on. “Kenny told me you guys used to date.” Clyde pried.

“Yeah…” Tweek said in a small voice, eyes still trained to the TV while he sipped his coffee. He was on the meds, he had been since he came back from the doctor.

“He said something about you bea… hitting him once?”

Tweek visibly stiffened at the suggestion. “Twice, I broke his wrist.” He said it in a monotone that would rival Craig’s (since Craig had developed that nasty growl to his monotone).

“Why?!” Clyde asked. He’d asked as if Tweek was a normal person who had made the _decision_ to hit someone. Tweek raised his shoulders into a small shrug and continued staring into obliviousness. “What do you mean you don’t know? Did he scare you?” Clyde pressed.

“I don’t remember doing it.” Tweek mumbled. “He was…” Tweek sat frozen, still staring off into space.

“He was what?” Clyde reached up and turned the other’s head towards his.

“We were… kissing. Then… he was hurt and leaving, and my parents… gave me the needle.”

“Needle?” Clyde cringed.

“When I’m out of control they give me a sedative. It’s necessary…” Tweek bowed his head dejectedly. “I have psychotic episodes… I think it’s the voices taking control of my body…” He looked dazed, lost, and Clyde’s heart hurt. “They never liked Kenny…” The last part was spoken so soft Clyde could barely hear him.

“Voices? You hear voices?”

“Sometimes… Not as much when I take my medicine.” Tweek rubbed the back of his own neck, “They’re _there_ but they’re softer… and I don’t _have_ to listen to them.”

“Do they hate _me_?” Clyde didn’t really want to ask but he had to know what he was in for.

“They don’t _like_ you.” Tweek took a deep breath, as if he had thought about lying to Clyde. “They don’t _like_ anyone… even mother.” A string of drool ran down Tweek’s chin after his last sentence, it made Clyde feel like everything Tweek had said may have been induced by the stupor. Maybe Craig was right… _‘Dangerous territory.’_

* * *

Clyde was lounging on his bed watching the Monday night football game when a knock came to his front door. _Shit_ he was running out of pause time on the DVR, he should have recorded it! He opened the door to a shocking sight. Tweek stood there, dripping wet from the rain, shaking characteristically. Well, lately the shaking had stopped but Clyde had missed it. “Tweek? Did you take your meds?” Tweek shook his head violently but didn’t say anything, he stared back at Clyde with wide frightened eyes.

Clyde stepped aside to let Tweek out of the rain, and to save his heating bill. “I just w-wanted to s-see you.” Clyde wrapped his couch blanket around Tweek’s shivering form and rubbed his arms reassuringly.

“I thought you weren’t allowed out without supervision?” Clyde had thought it felt and sounded rude, but Tweek was the one who’d said that.

“I ran.” He said in that _small_ voice. _The voices keep telling me they’re poisoning me!_

Clyde led Tweek to his bedroom and snuggled up with him to keep him warm, while switching the football game back on. Clyde was taken-aback when Tweek started kissing at his jaw, it was so _forward_ for Tweek, although it seemed more comfortable than kissing on the mouth had been and Clyde was ok with that. He smiled and glanced down at his _boyfriend_ , that’s what they were, weren’t they? He leaned down and left a small kiss on the corner of Tweek’s mouth. Tweek snuggled closer, he was squirming and still kissing at Clyde’s neck and jaw.

How could one not get aroused in this particular situation? Tweek’s leg kept brushing Clyde’s lap unintentionally and it was driving him mad. He tried to shift his position but it only made things worse. Tweek was coming on strong, but Clyde remembered what happened that last time someone had tried to touch Tweek in a non-platonic way… ‘ _Twice, I broke his wrist’_

Clyde shuddered at the thought but Tweek was clutching to him tighter, kissing him harder, and making sweet little noises that assured Clyde that this was on Tweek’s terms. Clyde started to respond by kissing Tweek the way Tweek was kissing him which was anywhere but the mouth. Tweek did not respond poorly, in fact he seemed energized by Clyde’s spattering of kisses and climbed up to sit on Clyde’s lap. Clyde had thought the leg had been making him crazy, this was _worse_. He started thinking to himself, what was the probability of Tweek coming over for a romp? Very low and yet...

A million things flashed through Clyde’s head while Tweek’s exploring hands were getting braver and braver, caressing Clyde’s groin and nibbling at his neck. _Scotch, Extra caramel, The drugged fantasy he’d had about Tweek, Hot chocolate, Their first kiss, The bruise on Mrs. Tweak’s face, Tweek puking those pills up, Ice Skating, Kenny’s confession, Second base…_ Wait! Tweek was quickly getting to second base with Clyde, but he was unsure how to respond or if he should push the boy off of him in fear, it was all very confusing.

Tweek had one hand down Clyde’s pants at this point, still nibbling helplessly at Clyde’s neck. Clyde was not sure if he should… he timidly ghosted a finger across the front of Tweek’s pants, the boy jerked a bit but did not resist so Clyde got braver and rubbed a little harder this time. The next thing Clyde knew a sharp pain spread through his chest, he watched Tweek tumble backwards and fall over his coffee table screaming “AHHH!” Clyde grimaced, tears stinging his eyes. _What was THAT?!_ He dared to look at the source of pain to find a ball point pen stuck into his flesh. Clyde grabbed at the offending object and held it still, It was so near his heart, he wasn’t sure if he should pull it out or not. He couldn’t focus on Tweek’s current state because he felt dizzy, really dizzy and hot blood was pouring down his shirt. He was crying so hard his vision was blurry.

“No…” Was the only thing Clyde could say. The sound of sirens drawing near startled him. He saw Tweek crawling backwards on the floor, inching away from Clyde with huge eyes like _he_ was the dangerous one! There was a loud knock at the door, he hadn’t called 911 but he’d been about to, did they read his mind? He very painfully made his way to the door with his weak legs and pulled it open.

There were two police officers and one immediately spoke, “We’re looking for a fugitive by the name of Tweek Tweak. We have reason to believe…” The officer stopped talking and regarded Clyde’s physical state (pale and bleeding everywhere). “We’re going to need an ambulance up here, stat.” He mumbled into his radio before pushing past Clyde to retrieve the ‘fugitive’. The other officer caught Clyde on his fainting decent to the floor.

* * *

Clyde woke up in a hospital bed, machines beeping around him. He was still dizzy and his shoulder was in excruciating pain. “Glad to see you awake Mr. Donovan.” A voice came from his left, it was a doctor. His father was sleeping in a chair in the corner. “You really gave us a scare, it punctured an artery. We stitched you up and gave you a blood transfusion; you’ll have to remain here for observation for a few more days. Please let us know if there’s anything we can do to make your stay more comfortable.” The doctor nodded at Mr. Donovan’s sleeping form and left.

Even if Clyde had wanted to respond he couldn’t, he had some kind of tube in his throat and an oxygen mask on top of that. His father stirred and glanced up at Clyde. “Son…” He stood on shaky legs and walked over, “You’ve been out for days.” He ran his hand across Clyde’s forehead. “I thought you were going to…” He sighed deeply, still touching his son’s face.

Clyde looked up at the man innocently, he hardly remembered what happened and sent a pleading look at his father. “The nurses will remove this tube soon, I’m sure. If you’re wondering about your attacker, they placed him in an asylum until trial. I assume you want to press charges?” Clyde scrunched his eyebrows in his father’s direction, _charges?_ “Assault with a deadly weapon, attempted murder is even being thrown around, that kid has _issues_. We have a good lawyer though, don’t worry.” Clyde’s eyes widened in remembering the ‘assult’, it was _Tweek._

* * *

Tweek had never worn a straightjacket before, it was strangely comforting (although he had the urge to struggle against it every twenty four minutes or so). It wasn’t the jacket that made him scared it was _this room_. It was a small tan room, it seemed to be made of leather couch cushions, maybe this was _hell?!_ The window was too small and high for Tweek to see through and he couldn’t climb up because he couldn’t use his hands! He struggled, he cried out for help, he sobbed. No one could hear him, what was HAPPENING?! The voices were screaming at him (Loud because there were no distractions _) that this was the place they put people when they wanted to kill them and cover it up! No one would notice him missing and even if they did they wouldn’t be able to FIND HIM!_ He continuously bashed his side into the padded wall for a few minutes before sitting down defeated again; he’d try to escape again in twenty four minutes or so. “One, two, three, four, five, six….”

Three men burst into the room, they kind of looked like doctors. Tweek asked them questions but they acted as if he wasn’t there or they couldn’t hear him which made him twice as paranoid that they were certainly going to kill him as the voices suggested. They held him down like he was a rabid animal, they forced pills down his throat with their fingers, massaging his throat as if he didn’t have the reflex or he might spit them out. They left as quickly as they had come and Tweek cried for almost an hour before the effects of the medicine calmed him to sleep.

* * *

Clyde was embarrassed that he threw up when they pulled the tube from his throat but glad to be able to speak, he addressed his father, doctor, and the investigators at the same time. His voice was raspy and dry but it was clear what he said, “I _don’t_ want to press charges…”

The investigator answered, speaking calmly and clinically “That’s for you to decide, however Mr. Tweak will need to undergo a psychiatric re-evaluation and we may need to place him into the custody of the state. Criminal charges wouldn’t likely change the proceedings much.”

* * *

They didn’t often pull Tweek out of his padded room, they would occasionally to feed him slop or let him sit outside for a few brief moments. He was losing all semblance of reality being constantly left with his _mind_ and those _voices_. He wasn’t sure if he liked being let out anymore; he was safe in his cage…everyone else was safe from him too. These drugs felt different than the ones his parents had given him, maybe close to the needle but without the sleepiness. Tweek couldn’t stand up by himself, the nurses had to lift him by his armpits on either side and move with his wobbly legs trying to walk, he was sure he knew _how_ to walk but he couldn’t quite piece it together.

He was seated in a large comfortable chair in an office with egotistical plant life and plate glass windows staring him down like a foreign object. The nurses tightened the jacket he wore, keeping his arms so stiff he yearned to stretch them out. There was a metal loop in the back of the chair to hook his jacket to, supposedly so he couldn’t lunge across the desk to _bite_ anyone. Tweek felt like a dangerous criminal or a monster being kept secure, like a caged fighting dog being staked in the ground. He had staked his boyfriend in the heart, his sweet boyfriend…

 _“…Deserved it… fucking…hopefully dead… deserved it…”_ Tweek wished he could tug on his hair or cover his ears, the voices were so LOUD! He tried to bang his forehead on the desk but the tether on his jacket kept him just inches from release.

A tall woman entered the room, she had her hair in a tightly wound bun and was wearing a business suit, the kind women of power wore with a black pencil skirt and a bright red blazer. “Mr. Tweak, is that your name? I’m Dr. Brown.” She said sweetly from the door, maybe keeping her distance before she’d gauged his reactions.

Tweek stared at her, his eyes like saucers; he grunted and twitched, he hadn’t spoken in a while. “Tweek tweek tweek tweek….” He muttered quietly rocking back and forth.

“Tweek, is it ok if we talk?” She wasn’t using the baby voice like his old psychologist, she was talking evenly. She didn’t wait for an answer as she cautiously made her way to the other side of the desk. “Do you know why you’re here? Do you remember the _incident_?” She asked calmly as if she wasn’t asking if he remembered _stabbing_ someone.

“YES!” He cried out looking around nervously.

“Do you understand the severity of the situation?”

Tweek hummed and nodded his head vigorously, he _did_ remember. “I love him…” Tweek let out an uneven breath.

“You were involved? Is that why you ran away?” She said calmly, looking at her clipboard.

“What does that MEAN?!” His pupils got wide for a moment before he returned to normal.

“Mr. Donovan.” She read from her file, “Mr. Clyde Donovan.” Tweek squeaked at as the name left her lips. “He gave a statement when the police asked for his side of the story and I quote; ‘Tweek came to my house and I let him in _knowing_ he’d run away and I knew he hadn’t taken his medication. He wasn’t acting like himself, he was affectionate and I wasn’t used to it so I took advantage. It’s _my_ fault, I knew it might happen and I was negligent.’” She finished, finally looking Tweek in the eyes.

“He’s alive…” Tweek whispered more to himself than to Dr. Brown. The woman nodded slightly, “It’s _not_ his fault!”

“Whose fault _is_ it?” She leaned forward slightly in interest.

“My – my – my…” Tweek paused and groaned in agony, it was either help Clyde or die; it was too much pressure… He _loved_ Clyde. “My DAD!” He shuddered, “Th-that’s what…” The doctor looked interested.

“Your father?” She mused, “What’s he got to do with this?”

Tweek cringed, he didn’t want to say! He was sure to die if he told… but Clyde… “He… when I’m… when my mom’s gone he gets the needle…” He took a deep breath, Dr. Brown leaned in further, curious.

“The needle?” She looked at her clipboard, “A sedative?”

Tweek nodded again, a large tear spilling from his already moist eyes. “He’d give me the needle twice…” The doctor’s eyes widened, she scribbled down ‘ _prior sedative overdose – possible’_ “He would…” Tweek sobbed, “I CAN’T!” He wailed and started to rock back and forth again.

“He would what, Tweek? You want me to help you get out of here right?” Tweek nodded, another fresh tear slipping out.

“He put me in the basement… on the floor.” The voices kicked into full gear at the memory ‘ _You deserved it, you’re worthless!’_ “And… k-kicked me and made me… until I fell… asleep.” Another sob racked his body as he remembered and spoke his father’s words, “Tell anyone about this and I’ll kill you, _they’ll_ kill you for being so pathetic, everyone _IS_ out to get you, Tweek! You’re a worthless piece of SHIT!”Tweek yelled his father’s warning at the doctor who gasped and started scribbling on her clip board frantically.

Next to the section that said ‘ _mild bruising on torso, possibly self-induced’_ she scribbled ‘ _possibly caused by blunt force from outside party. Some mental issues may stem from abuse – medical review required, patient is a schizo personality with severe psychosis and may have delusions regarding wounds.’_

The doctor mentally prepared herself to test the truth in question, he could be making it all up, she was a leading expert on Tweek’s type of psychosis after all… “Do you think your father had the _right_ to punish you?” She squinted her eyes.

Tweek nodded in approval, of course his father had the _right_ to punish him. “Of course! I’m so annoying…”

“Do you _dream_ about your father kicking you or is it _before_ you dream?” These were all questions made to tell the difference between the truth and delusions.

“Before! I dream about coffee and… My mom’s smile… Kenny’s stories… Clyde’s smile.” He sniffed.

Later that evening the doctor, who physically examined Tweek’s fading bruises confirmed to Dr. Brown that due to shape and placement they _were_ likely induced by an outside party. It made Dr. Brown tear up when she heard it, she’d nearly expected this to be a paranoid delusion. It made sense that a child with a rather non-violent disorder was lashing out… he was taught that was how to deal with stress and frustration and it was ingrained into him.

Tweek was sitting in a plain white room with a large mirror on one side, the nurses removed his jacket for the first time in over a week and he took the opportunity to stretch his stiff limbs all the way to his fingers. They’d also stopped administering his medicine for hours. What was _happening?_

A voice came over a speaker, “How are you today, Mr. Tweak?” Tweek paranoid gaze shot around the room searching for the source. A small black speaker was hanging from the corner above the mirror. _Thay’re watching me._

“Fine…” Tweek answered uneasily to the unfamiliar voice. _Is this hell?_

“I’m going to ask you a series of questions, please feel free to answer in any way you’d like, whatever comes to mind.” Tweek nodded to the mysterious voice, “Do you feel that others often control what you think and feel.”

“Sometimes…”

“Is it difficult for you to express yourself to others?”

“Yes.”

“Do you believe anything about reality that no one else seems to believe?”

“Just a little…”

“Are people unbelieving of the things you say you’ve seen?”

“Yes.”

“Do you believe you have any magical powers?”

“No!” _How ridiculous._

“Are other people plotting against you?”

“S-Sometimes.”

“Do you hear sounds or voices that only _you_ can hear?”

“All the time…”

* * *

Clyde was nervous about the trial, but excited as he hadn’t seen Tweek in almost two weeks. He entered the court room followed by Tweek’s parents and psychologist. He looked around frantically trying to find the twitching blonde but he was nowhere in sight, but Kenny was there.

“First witness to the stand, Dr. Fredrick Murphy PHD.” The old man hobbled up to the witness stand and swore in before the judge began his questioning. “Dr. Murphy, do you believe your patient Tweek Tweak to be a violent man?” The word ‘man’ sounded weird to Clyde’s ears, the boy was so small, but he was surely being tried as an adult.

“I was never led to believe so, the Tweaks assured me he had no violent tendencies. Nor did he show any sign of wanting to harm anyone.”

“So it would be safe to assume that if a violent act _had_ occurred while the patient was in your care it was the fault of Mr. Tweak’s parents withholding that information?”

“Yes.” The old man sighed. He clearly cared about Tweek’s well-being.

Clyde raised an eyebrow, this wasn’t what he expected to happen, they weren’t pointing a finger at Tweek at all…

“Next witness, Mr. Clyde Donovan.” Clyde got up nervously and approached the stand.

“Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you god?”

“I do.”

“Mr. Donovan,” The judge started, looking down at his notes. “Your statement to the police regarding the assault incident was that you did _not_ want to press charges and the event was caused by your own negligence?” He glared at Clyde intimidatingly.

“Sir, I know a lot about Tweek, we’ve been classmates since we were children. I started getting too close to him, knowing that he wasn’t… completely sane. He’d never hurt anyone on purpose. I went too far.”

“What were you doing when the assault occurred?”

“We were… kissing.” The whole of the court seemed to gasp collectively, Clyde felt like an asshole. “He gets nervous when he’s touched.” Clyde added.

“That will be all, Mr. Donovan.”

“Next witness, Mr. Kenneth McCormick to the stand.” Kenny rose and walked to his destination, he scoffed at the bible they placed before him.

“Mr. McCormick, there was an undocumented assault to your person you’d like to speak about?” He questioned.

“Tweek hit me once too, but he didn’t mean to.” Kenny said nonchalantly, “It wasn’t _him_ it wasn’t his _disorder_ , it was something else. I _know_ because I’ve seen that look before.” Kenny cleared his throat and leaned forward, like he did when he was telling one of his crazy stories. “My sister was sexually abused by my uncle, who’s now in prison by the way; whenever a boy tries to ask her out or kiss her or whatever she gets that same look in her eyes and tries to hit them. It’s a defense mechanism for people who are really vulnerable, that’s what her doctor said. I’m _sure_ it was the same look he gave me before he hit me and I’m sure it’s more intense because he already has some issues.” Kenny knew something Clyde didn’t or he wouldn’t be here… there was no way he was trying to get Tweek locked up!

“Thank you, Mr. McCormick. That will be all.”

“Next witness, Mr. Richard Tweak.” Tweek’s father approached the stand. “Mr. Tweak, do you think your son is a violent man?”

“Sometimes.” He cleared his throat nervously.

“Are you aware of the wounds in which Dr. Murphy was told were self-inflicted wounds from night fits?”

“Yes, he’s a feisty boy sometimes!” He laughed.

“During rehabilitation Tweek was examined and it was determined that he did _not_ cause those marks. Do you have any recollection of who might have inflicted the marks?” The judge looked kind of angry, it was scaring Clyde.

“Maybe he got into a fight?” Mr. Tweak shrugged.

“Dr. Brown and council, the witness is yours.” A tall stern lady and her council moved toward the podium.

The woman spoke after nodding at her lawyer, “Mr. Tweak I have a recording of Tweek himself telling me where he believes the marks to have come from. Together with the medical doctor’s findings and Tweek’s statement, we have reason to believe that _you_ might have caused them.” She held up the recorder in her hand. Clyde fumed at the thought that Mr. Tweak had hurt his son.

“H-he’s crazy! Don’t believe what _he_ says!” The man became frantic.

“Do we need to play the tape?” The woman’s lawyer threatened.

“No!” He shouted in defense, “Don’t play it!”

“Scared?” Dr. Brown chuckled.

“Mr. Tweak you’re under arrest anything you…” Clyde tuned it out, he wasn’t sure what to think. Where was Tweek?

* * *

They were talking _about_ him like he wasn’t there again. It was getting on his nerves, he wanted to scream out _I’m right here you idiots!_

“Schizophrenia is usually a non-violent disorder and as such I think we’ll be fine releasing him into his mother’s care.” Dr. Murphy said. He was talking to Tweek’s new psychologist Dr. Brown who was regarding him with a wary eye.

“I think our best course of action will be to release Tweek to his mother in time, his routine is good for him and he has never said anything problematic about her, although a live in nurse may be prudent. He seems to suffer from advanced psychosis when he’s left alone, and seems far more lucid around company.”

“The soft straps need to remain affixed, the boy has severe sleeping issues but sleep medication cannot be mixed with his other prescriptions.”

“Yes, we’ll continue with your newest course of treatment; mother administering meds and soft straps, and supervision… and I’ll continue speaking with him on a weekly basis. Psychology combined with psychiatry can’t hurt in this case.”

“Hm.” Dr Murphy nodded, although he was not a big supporter of psychology (over exaggerated counselors he always called them), but he could not complain if she agreed with his own diagnosis and continued treatment.

“Do I get to go home?” Tweek asked in a shuddering voice, tugging violently at his hair. Dr. Murphy walked over and removed the offending fists from the boy’s head.

“You miss you’re mommy?” He asked, “Don’t worry, son. You’ll get to go home soon.” He cooed, talking in his baby-talk.

“He’s not an infant.” Dr. Brown laughed. Tweek glanced at her sharply. “It’s nearly _more_ damaging when you talk to him like that, he needs independence as much as it’s possible to be given.”

Dr. Murphy sighed at her suggestion. “What Tweek _needs_ is a lollypop.” He ruffled the boy’s hair affectionately and handed him a sucker from his pocket. Tweek’s anxiety melted away, it reminded him of his childhood in a comforting way, Dr. Murphy always had a butterscotch dum dum for Tweek, _every time_ he saw him. The boy greedily ripped the wrapper open and stuck the candy in his mouth, it was refreshing after all the hospital food. Dr. Brown rolled her eyes at the display.

He wasn’t sure which one of them he liked better, but they were his allies.

* * *

Clyde had been having fits of depression ever since they locked Tweek away. He wondered if it would be forever, if he’d ever get to kiss those trembling lips again, if he would ever even _see_ Tweek again, maybe he should just get over it… His phone rang which scared him from his thoughts, most people knew to just text Clyde. The phone number was unrecognizable but had a familiar Colorado area code.

“Hello?” A woman answered.

“Hi?”

“It’s Mrs. Tweek.” She sounded nervous, just like her son…

“Hey, how are you?” Clyde frowned, he wasn’t sure why she would call him or _where_ she’d gotten his phone number. He knew she was having a rough time losing her whole family in less than a month.

“I’m fine, dear. I thought maybe you’d like to be here when Tweek comes home? He should be arriving in about fifteen minutes.”

Clyde’s eyes widened, “Yes, of course! Thank you!”

“You’re not too hurt?” She asked, concerned.

“It’s healing fine, thanks. I’ll be right over.” He hung up the phone and pulled his shoes on excitedly.

* * *

Tweek didn’t want his mother to see him in this damn jacket, but it’s how they insisted on transporting him. He felt like a criminal in the back of the armored van, but was relieved to see familiar buildings out the little window. They’d tied the jacket loose enough so he could set his hands in his lap but they were still led together by the straps.

The truck came to a stop and the doors opened, Tweek wasn’t used to the sunlight anymore and squinted at the offending beams.

“Tweek, darling!” His mother yelled, he adjusted his eyes to search for her. The two men from the front of the truck came back and pulled him up from his seat by the armpits, his armpits were so sore from all the rough treatment over the last few days. They started unhooking the jacket’s straps and Tweek groaned in frustration, he hated when they did that _bottom_ strap, it was so close to his privates. They moved to grab his arms again once he was out of the restraining jacket but he jerked away, “I can WALK!” He yelled and proceeded to climb from the truck and into his mother’s waiting arms.

Clyde stared from the driveway. Tweek’s eyes were rimmed with dark circles, his hair was too long and sticking up, he was thinner, and he looked worn out. “Hey.” He said calmly as not to startle Tweek. He turned slowly from his mother’s arms and looked at Clyde with wide eyes. They hadn’t really seen each other since Tweek had _stabbed_ Clyde with a dirty pen from his coffee table.

“Oh my god!” Tweek’s hands wound into his hair instantly and his eyes became glassy with un-spilled tears. “Clyde…” One tear escaped his eye on the right side and hit the pavement.

Clyde stepped closer and gestured to give Tweek a hug, Tweek stepped away still clutching at his hair. “I’m glad to see you…” Clyde frowned.

“Oh jesus! I STABBED you! Why don’t you _hate_ me?! Why are you HERE?” He was crying hard now, his mother stood off to the side looking worried at his state.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Clyde reached out with one hand, Tweek flinched away. Clyde felt his own tears climbing up, but he insisted on not freaking Tweek out.

“Yes it WAS! I did it, it’s MY FAULT!” Tweek was sobbing through his screams and Clyde was shrinking back, not sure what to do. He thought this would be a happy reunion.

“Why don’t we all go inside and have some coffee?” Mrs. Tweek hummed sweetly, gesturing at the door.

“Can I please hug you? I missed you…” Clyde’s voice broke a little but he held his tears at bay. Tweek seemed to calm slightly, removing the fists from his head and taking a deep breath he stepped toward Clyde and gently wrapped his arms around the larger man’s torso.

* * *

“Why don’t you boys go upstairs and catch up, I’ll start making us some lunch.” Mrs. Tweek said, depositing some pills into Tweek’s hand as well as a fresh mug of coffee. “Now be a good boy and take your pills.”

Clyde and Tweek settled against the bed, Clyde’s eyes widened at the new strap installments. Tweek eyeballed the handful of pills and glanced up at Clyde. “It’s ok…” Clyde mumbled, not sure if Tweek was looking for reassurance.

“Can you do me a favor?” Tweek said quietly while looking down at the colorful pills.

“Yeah, what’s up?” Clyde smiled.

“Can we try again? W-what we were doing when I came over to your house?” Clyde cringed, he wasn’t ready for _that_ , he wasn’t ready to be stabbed or kicked again.

“I don’t know …” Clyde said wearily.

“I have an idea.” Tweek was still talking to his hand. “I won’t hurt you, I promise.” Clyde sighed as Tweek threw back the pills and sipped at his coffee. He moved to lay down on his bed behind Clyde and started strapping down his ankles and then his wrists.

“What are you doing?!” Clyde asked incredulously.

“Just pretend I’m not on medication and I’m not tied up… I love you, I _do_ want you...” Tweek sounded genuine, placing his last unstrapped limb in the cuffs and gesturing at it to Clyde.

“I love you too.” Clyde answered, reaching over to secure the last strap, “But… this doesn’t feel right.”

“It’s consensual.” Tweek’s words were already becoming slurred.

“Can I get that in writing?” Clyde couldn’t help but to recall the dirty thoughts he’d had about catatonic Tweek in the shower, he _had_ fantasized about touching Tweek while he was practically a rag doll, but it had just been an innocent thought, this would make it real.

“I can’t write right now.” Tweek’s head lolled to one side, glaring at Clyde with large eyes. Clyde leaned down and kissed Tweek gently, earning very little reaction in return. He kissed Tweek’s neck and collar bone, the boy jerked away for a moment making Clyde sit up fast but Tweek reassured him, “It’s fine.” In a small slurred voice.

“I don’t want to take advantage of you.” Clyde frowned.

“You’re not.” Tweek had a whimsical face on suddenly, starring at the ceiling and grinning, another pill must have kicked in.

“Why are you smiling?” Clyde teased at the goofy expression.

“Because I don’t _hear_ anything… except you.” Tweek blinked slowly, at least slower than a normal person. Clyde bravely ran the tips of his fingers up Tweek’s side under his shirt, the boy shivered under his touch, still grinning happily. Tweek closed his eyes and arched up into the touch, “I wish I could exist… with only you… _all the time_.” His words were barely reasonable but Clyde understood them.

Clyde reached down to unbutton Tweek’s pants and pull them down only an inch or so, the top of Tweek’s arousal sticking out of his underwear just barely. Clyde leaned down and sucked at Tweek’s hip bone which protruded almost unnaturally, Tweek sucked in a breath. Clyde then moved down to place his mouth on the tip of Tweek’s organ, just ghosting over it, trying to gauge a reaction. Tweek twisted and moaned, the artificial grin still plastered across his face. Clyde pulled Tweek’s pants down a little further and took him into his mouth as far as he could go. Tweek was _rock hard_ which was a good indication Tweek was enjoying this and not being held against his will, Clyde had to remind himself several times. Once Clyde’s mouth was tired and he was sure Tweek had lasted over twenty minutes _because_ the drugs made it difficult for him to release he brought Tweek to completion with his hand and mopped up the mess.

Clyde did not expect reciprocation as he was afraid the twitchy blonde would bite off his dick! He quickly cleaned his hand and walked back over to the boy, who was still strapped down and still had that _smile_ on his face. “Your mom’s making lunch.” Clyde said, he could smell whatever she was cooking.

Tweek opened his eyes as Clyde was undoing the straps at his wrists and ankles. “Did you want me to…” Tweek started shyly.

“Another time.” Clyde grinned at him releasing the last strap. “Was that… Okay?” He blushed.

“Okay?” Tweek frowned at his boyfriend, “Amazing!” His eyes looked plastic, would he remember this?

* * *

Tweek fell asleep on top of his grilled cheese, he’d barely touched it and was mostly sipping coffee but he’d simply passed out. Clyde tried to scoot the plate out from under his face but was having difficulty. Mrs. Tweak stopped at the edge of the table and looked strangely at her son. “I can never get him to sleep like that!” She scooped another helping onto Clyde’s plate because he’d finished every bite, “Oh well, must be the new meds. Just let him sleep.” _It wasn’t the meds, it was the orgasm._

“I’m sorry about your husband.” Clyde couldn’t help mentioning it, it slipped out.

“Oh.” She looked sadly at Tweek’s sleeping form. “He could get rather stern with poor Tweek. He never really wanted children… he’s a business man after all.” She said it all with a fake sweetness that made Clyde sick. He couldn’t believe she was talking about Tweek’s father beating him so nonchalantly.

Clyde gave Tweek a little shake, if the boy continued sleeping he’d have to leave and he didn’t want to, he was glad to see him again. Tweek sprung up to his feet at the feeling of Clyde’s hand on his shoulder and screamed “They’re coming!” With a little grease shining on the cheek he’d rested on the now smashed sandwich.

“Whose coming, dear?” Mrs. Tweak asked calmly, grabbing his flattened sandwich from the table (She knew he wouldn’t eat it).

“Uh… no one.” Tweek answered, eyes darting around nervously.

“Why don’t you boys go upstairs and watch a movie, I’m going to tidy up.” She wiped Tweek’s greasy cheek with the edge of her apron and walked back into the kitchen.

“What do you wanna watch?” Clyde asked the twitchy boy.

“I don’t know, I can’t pick; that’s _way_ too much pressure!” He yanked his hair; Clyde had his old Tweek back, until… Mrs. Tweek approached them again holding out the new handful of pills.

Tweek threw them in his mouth and chugged the remaining cold black coffee in his cup without protest, he didn’t want to go back to the rehabilitation center! Clyde followed him upstairs where Tweek left him with a CD case full of DVDs and departed to the bathroom.

Clyde set the case on the shelf and quietly followed Tweek to the bathroom. He pressed his ear up against the door and heard the obvious sound of his boyfriend regurgitating the pills he’d just swallowed… again. This _couldn’t_ be healthy! The door was unlocked but Clyde didn’t want to go in, he didn’t want to see it and he couldn’t stop it now. He returned to the bedroom and started flipping through the CD case.

Tweek returned with a toothbrush sticking out of his mouth, he wasn’t trying to hide it from Clyde at all! “Don’t tell mom but I totally _bailed_ those pills.” He had a paranoid look on his face.

“You’ve gotta stop doing that!” Clyde growled. “You’ll get… I don’t know ulcers and tooth decay or something.”

“I know you like _me_ better than… _drug me_. I don’t know why…” Tweek dropped the toothbrush in the trashcan and when Clyde gave him a weird look he explained, “I use a different one every time, the GERMS!” Clyde nodded in understanding.

“Resident Evil?” Clyde held up the disk.

“Noooo!” Tweek looked at Clyde in horror. “Have you _seen_ that? It’s fucking terrifying!”

Clyde laughed and scooted the disk back into its holder. “ok… how about… Kick Ass?” Tweek nodded vigorously.

* * *

As they were watching the movie Clyde was playing with one of the straps and reminiscing about their earlier tryst, he’d wished he had the courage to ask Tweek to do anything to him but he was too scared. Tweek noticed him _not_ watching the movie and scooted closer, leaning his head gently against Clyde’s shoulder. “I want to kiss you.” He sighed.

Clyde looked up at him, “So? kiss me.”

“Can you like… can you brush your teeth first? I have a lot of toothbrushes! Sorry…” Tweek looked like he _was sorry_ for asking but Clyde understood.

“Don’t apologize.” Clyde got up from the bed and made his way into the bathroom. Tweek popped his head around the corner, eyes wide watching Clyde wash his mouth for _him_. He didn’t understand _why_ Clyde liked him at all; his eyes wandered to Clyde’s chest wondering what his stab wound looked like weeks later.

Clyde was thorough in his cleaning to make sure Tweek wasn’t panic-stricken by his germs. He could see the other boy staring into the mirror as he spit the foamy soap out of his mouth. He wiped his mouth with a hand towel instead of his sleeve like he’d normally do, to ensure it was as sanitary as it could be. Tweek walked up to him cautiously and leaned upwards to kiss him, it tasted minty and fresh which made Tweek comfortable enough to tentatively brush his tongue across Clyde’s. Tweek whipped his head around to the hall, anxious that his mother might catch them (He didn’t know she’d heard in court that Clyde had kissed Tweek, he hadn’t been present).

“Back to the movie?” Clyde asked, nudging his twitchy boyfriend towards his bedroom.

They got comfortable on Tweek’s bed again and Tweek started to snuggle against Clyde who had no qualms with it whatsoever. Clyde looked down at the blonde who leaned in for another kiss, this one was deeper and lasted much longer. Clyde had never kissed Tweek this deeply as he was always pulling away, but Tweek was _initiating_ it. Clyde decided that was the best course of action, he would let Tweek do whatever he wanted and never instigate anything, that should keep his nerves at a minimum. Clyde wasn’t in any hurry to get stabbed again but he was getting aroused from the luxurious kiss Tweek was drowning him with.

They watched the movie some more but after a few minutes Tweek was urging him to kiss again and he didn’t protest. He felt one of Tweek’s shaky hands on his knee and it made his dick twitch with anticipation, _‘No! Down boy!’_ he mused in his head. The hand crept closer and Clyde was starting to sweat from the intense _need_ he was feeling. That anxious hand was on his inner thigh now just centimeters from his neglected organ, but Clyde kept his hands to himself for fear of being attacked again. One teasing little finger finally brushed over the front of his pants _‘Yes! Right there!’_ but Tweek quickly withdrew his hand before cautiously brushing over it again.

Tweek was being a _tease_ , not intentionally but it was driving Clyde mad. “You can do whatever you want to me…” He broke their kiss to whisper in Tweek’s ear, trying to urge him on gently. Tweek looked up at Clyde as if looking for confirmation in his eyes and then glanced back down, tongue between his teeth. He very gently but bravely unbuckled Clyde’s jeans and reached on of his jittery hands inside to touch Clyde’s hot flesh.

Clyde tried to keep his body under control and not thrust up or say anything stupid for fear of startling Tweek. He laid back and enjoyed it as still and quiet as he could. It wasn’t firm or rhythmic at all, Tweek’s ministrations were weak, scared, awkward and jerky… exactly how Clyde had imagined Tweek would be in his fantasies. He leaned back and closed his eyes, he could feel hot pressure building up in his groin but whenever Tweek got him close-ish he would change rhythm and Clyde would lose the build-up. He tried to focus on the pleasure enveloping his body, imagining dirty things he’d _like_ to say if he could and glanced over at Tweek who looked like he was in concentration. Tweek’s face was flushed and it looked so erotic to Clyde; that was his breaking point. As soon as he started watching Tweek’s beautiful face his orgasm came like a tidal wave. Tweek made a noise of surprise “Gah!” when the hot liquid poured down his knuckles.

Tweek held his newly dirtied hand out comically in front of his wide eyes. Clyde tried not to laugh at the other boy’s expression. Tweek stood and rushed for the bathroom spilling a couple drops on his carpet which Clyde wiped up with a tissue. Clyde was in awe, he couldn’t believe that just happened! Clyde was so in _love._

* * *

Clyde was shocked when he received a call from Dr. Brown, the stern woman he’d seen at the courtroom. She requested he join their next counseling session, she also advised that Tweek enjoyed talking about Clyde in therapy which made him rather self-conscious. He agreed, thinking that maybe Tweek had _requested_ his presence in which case he just couldn’t refuse.

Mrs. Tweak picked Clyde up on the date of their session; Tweek was sitting in the passenger seat looking rather nervous. “Ms. Brown likes to speak to Tweek when he’s _not_ medicated.” She explained without prompting. Tweek glared at her, Clyde knew he hated when people talked about him like he wasn’t there.

“Well, _that’s_ good.” Clyde said flippantly.

“Why is that _good?”_ Mrs. Tweak asked, genuinely curious at Clyde’s statement.

Clyde didn’t know how to respond, the comment had been blurted with little to no thought. “It’s kind of impossible to talk to him when he can’t even _think_.” Clyde answered. Tweek smiled back at him, he must have said _something_ right.

Dr. Brown’s office was as professional looking as she was, they each took a seat on an expensive looking brown leather sofa in front of her desk, Mrs. Tweak waited in the lobby.

“Hello, Tweek; Wonderful to see you again Mr. Donovan.” She set a stack of papers in the center of her desk.

“Hello.” Clyde said nervously waving one hand. He looked to Tweek for guidance because this was a situation he’d never been in before. Tweek looked oddly calm in this woman’s presence and Clyde was the one who was acting nervous.

“Tweek, how was your week?” She asked, looking at her papers and not him.

“G-good… I cut down on my coffee, it’s helping with the shakes.” He held his less shaky hands up but Dr. Brown was still not looking directly at Tweek.

“And, how is your mother?”

“She’s being weird, but she probably misses dad so I don’t know what to DO!” He started wringing his hands in his hair.

“It’s not your responsibility. Don’t worry about it too much.” She answered, still not looking. Her words seemed to calm Tweek who settled back into his chair. “How’s Robert?”

Clyde looked at Tweek, one eyebrow raised. Who was _Robert?_ Tweek gave Clyde a nervous look before he answered the doctor. “He’s jealous of…” He glanced nervously at Clyde again, “He’s jealous of me.”

“Oh? Why is he so jealous?” She smiled and glanced up at Clyde reassuringly.

“He doesn’t get like…” Tweek wrung his hands together, fidgeting. “He doesn’t understand why everyone keeps being nice to me and they keep being mean to him because he says we’re the same.”

“Whose being mean to Robert?” She asked.

“Everyone! They want me to make him go away with the medicine and he tries to fight it… it makes my stomach _sick_. I even want him to...and sometimes only _he_ goes away and the other ones get louder and I don’t know what to do! It’s _way_ too much pressure, man.” Tweek whimpered.

Clyde realized they were talking about something fake, something in Tweek’s head and he didn’t like that it had a _name_ or that they were talking about it like it was a _real person_. “You want him to go away?” Tweek nodded at her question, “Is he afraid you think of him the same as the bad one?” Tweek nodded again vigorously. “Well, tell _him_ that you want him to help you to _only_ hear him. Maybe he’ll feel important, maybe he’ll help you get rid of the _other_ ones?” She finally looked directly at Tweek and he seemed to have a tiny nervous breakdown when he looked into her eyes, it must be why she was avoiding _his_. She turned towards Clyde and quickly explained, “Robert’s the _good_ one.” …Which explained nothing at all.

She wrote a little on her clip board, scrunching her eyebrows together. Tweek looked over at Clyde, worried, _Why did they have to talk about the voices now? In front of Clyde? Robert fancied himself Tweek’s boyfriend and he hated Clyde so much!_

“I bet I know a subject Robert _doesn’t_ like to talk about.” She said, looking directly at Clyde. “What does he think about _you?_ ” Clyde looked from the doctor to Tweek and back. She was asking _him._

“How should I know?” Clyde shrugged, he’d never been so confused and nervous in his entire life. Tweek yanked his hair and whined next to him, Clyde wrapped one arm around the shaking form. “We don’t… talk about that kind of stuff.”

“What _do_ you talk about?”

“I don’t know… movies, the weather, coffee…” Clyde wasn’t sure what she was fishing for but Tweek looked so startled it was making him uncomfortable.

Tweek growled next to him in frustration and spoke up, “ _Ug, he took that fucking zombie shit, didn’t he?_ ” Tweek said to his lap in an impression of Clyde. He’d said it weeks ago but Tweek remembered, he remembered every word Clyde had ever said to him, “ _If I wanted to hang out with a statue I’d go to a museum_.” Clyde flinched, and nudged Tweek to try and get him to stop. “ _We should go skating again some time…”_ Tweek turned his eyes up toward Clyde’s, “We _should_ go skating again sometime.” He smiled.

“What do you call each other? Friends? Lovers?” She looked curious for professional reasons which made Clyde even more nervous and he blushed when she used the word ‘lovers’.

“Clyde is… my boyfriend?” Tweek looked up at the brunet beside him.

“And what about Kenneth McCormick? What do you call him?” She was looking at Tweek for an answer.

“He’s my boyfriend too…” Clyde’s eyes widened, “Er… he used to be. I don’t really know… he doesn’t talk to me a lot anymore because I SCARE him! Jesus…” Tweek tried to take a deep breath but it was shuddering.

“Mr. Donovan, does Tweek _scare_ you?” Her eyes deceived her for a moment and wandered to where she knew Clyde had been wounded. Clyde somehow felt this was a test of some kind, but was willing to answer honestly.

“Tweek… doesn’t scare me, he doesn’t _mean_ any harm to anyone. I’m… sometimes a little scared of what _might_ be going on _inside_ him, but I’m definitely _not_ scared of him.” Clyde tightened the arm across Tweek’s shoulders reassuringly.

“And, you clearly have an aversion to Tweek being treated medicinally from what I hear?”

“Yeah… well… I’m sure medication is important but I think sometimes if it just…” ‘ _You’re the only one who doesn’t want me to disappear…’_ “If it just makes him disappear altogether… It’s not really helping him. Tweek doesn’t _want_ to take it.”

“How do you know, did he tell you that?”

“No, but…” He gave Tweek a sideways glance. He wondered if Tweek had told anyone about the purging… “Sometimes… please don’t be mad or tell his mom… but sometimes he,” Tweek climbed up Clyde like a tree and tried to cover his mouth.

“No no no no no no NO!”

Clyde pried the small hands from his face, “Sometimes he throws the pills up because they’re making him too tired or sick.”

“No! No I don’t!” Tweek’s eyes got shifty and his face blushed.

“It’s fine Tweek, I don’t have to tell anyone, I’ll talk to Dr. Murphy about your medication rounds maybe we can lower them?”

Tweek smiled and looked up at Clyde. “The truth will set you free.” He whispered, Clyde just chuckled and shook his head not sure how to respond.

* * *

Clyde was excited, it was the first day Tweek was allowed to go out by himself and he’d asked Clyde to take him on another date. The doctor had dropped his lithium in the case that it made Tweek depressed and possibly lead to self-harm. He still had some anxiety and OCD drugs that were mandatory so he wouldn’t be agoraphobic, but he was in good spirits when Clyde arrived.

“Now, don’t be out too late!” Mrs. Tweak warned the two. Clyde laughed internally thinking the scolding reminded him of his own mother who had passed away, he felt like a kid again.

Tweek quickly popped one little blue pill before exiting his house with Clyde. “It must be nice to be away from home.” Clyde said while they walked. The winter weather was perfect but the air smelled like frozen rain.

They went ice skating again, because Tweek had asked him three or four times if they could skate again. Clyde reveled in holding the object of his affection in his arms while they glided across the frozen water, _nothing_ could be more romantic than this! He took Tweek to the coffee shop when they couldn’t bear the cold any longer and they ordered hot drinks (Tweek’s a black coffee and Clyde’s a hot chocolate).

“Clyde…” Tweek started.

“Yes?” He smiled joyfully at the shaky boy.

“Do I annoy you?” He sipped nervously at his drink, but then again Tweek did _everything_ nervously.

“Of course not.” Clyde reached over to pat Tweek’s shoulder reassuringly. “I think you’re really interesting.”

“I…” Tweek’s eyes darted around the coffee shop in paranoia. The atmosphere and emptiness were just what his boyfriend needed right now. Clyde had been reading up on Tweek’s laundry list of conditions so he could better understand him. _Schizophrenia, mild psychosis, Attention Deficit disporder, Obsessive compulsive disorder, Social phobia…_ He knew Tweek’s wheels were always turning faster than other people’s and Clyde felt lucky he was a patient person. All Clyde saw when he looked at Tweek was pure innocence and beauty, not the sickness.

“You what?” Clyde laughed; Tweek hadn’t alluded to finishing his sentence.

“N-nothing!” He exclaimed, “I’m having a-a good time!” He sputtered.

“Me too.” Clyde smiled, rubbing circles on Tweek’s back to calm him. “Do you think you’ll ever be able to move out of your mom’s house?”

“I don’t know… That’s a _lot_ of pressure…” Clyde had been thinking about what it would be like to live with Tweek… he was falling in love and wanted everything _normal_ couples had.

“Would you move into my apartment if you _could?_ ” Clyde asked.

“Do you have cable or satellite?”

“Why?” Clyde raised an eyebrow.

“The satellite company’s been trying to get information out of me so we switched to cable.” Tweek said it like it was the most normal statement in the world.

Clyde couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face, “It’s kind of expensive, but I’d switch to cable if you moved in. I wouldn’t want anyone getting your precious information.”

“AND-and no garden gnomes!” Tweek squealed.

“I live in an apartment, there’s no place for gnomes.”

“Oh, thank god!” Tweek placed a hand on his chest. Clyde chuckled, he was starting to get used to this insane conversation and was afraid he might go crazy himself… he was _already_ crazy for Tweek, no matter what anyone thought of it.

“I love you.” Clyde said unconsciously with affection in his voice.

Tweek paused and turned his head towards Clyde, wide eyed. He just sat there staring and Clyde wasn’t sure if the reaction was good or bad… It started making him uncomfortable so he broke the silence.

“We should get you home before your mom worries.” Clyde sighed. It was starting to get dark outside.

“M-maybe you could stay for dinner!” Tweek suggested excitedly.

“Maybe…” Clyde smiled sadly; he really _had_ expected Tweek to say it back…

Tweek was shivering violently on the way home, the snow had begun to fall. Clyde took off his own jacket and swung it around Tweek’s shoulders. “Won’t you get hypothermia and DIE?!”

Clyde shook his head ‘no’ chuckling and grabbing one of Tweek’s hands gently in his own. “Maybe… I should just go home and I’ll come over tomorrow?” Clyde asked as they stopped at Tweek’s front door.

Tweek’s eyes looked sad at the comment, “I _really_ want you to come in though!” Tweek protested.

Clyde laughed and leaned down to give Tweek a quick peck on the lips. “Why?”

“I LOVE YOU TOO!” Tweek quickly shouted a little too loud, grabbing his unruly hair with one fist. Clyde smiled widely at the exclamation. “Please don’t go…” The last part was quieter.

“Okay, I’ll stay for a little bit.” Clyde ushered Tweek towards the door.

* * *

Mrs. Tweak made a pot roast, it was dry and chewy and Tweek barely touched it at all, but he _did_ eat all his vegetables.

Clyde followed Tweek up to his room, it was rather awkward sitting on the bed not quite sure what he was still doing here. Tweek leaned towards him and kissed his cheek and then whispered in his ear with a small shaky voice, “D-do you wanna… have s-sex?” Tweek quickly pulled away and scooted a couple inches from Clyde, blushing furiously.

“Um…” Clyde looked over at him but could not catch his eyes. “If you _want_ to.” Clyde was blushing too, and understandably nervous about the impending physical contact.

“I can put the straps on if you’re afraid of me.” Tweek frowned.

“I’m _not_ afraid of you…” Clyde said, it was the truth and by the smile Tweek was wearing it was exactly what the other wanted to hear. “I’ll be really careful and if I do something you don’t like just _tell me_.” _For god sakes don’t stab me._ Clyde glanced around quickly for anything sharp that might be lying near but he didn’t see anything, of course this _was_ Tweek’s room.

It was very awkward at first but Clyde was gentle in his kisses and light touches and it felt romantic, his chest was welling up with emotion… he wondered if Tweek felt the same. Tweek curled his hands into the bed sheets, maybe just as edgy about the possibility of an outburst as well, but his anxiety medication was doing its job well.

Clyde was so interested to see Tweek naked, the boy was _very_ skinny as he’d expected but he still looked good to Clyde. Tweek gestured at his nightstand where Clyde found some Vaseline and a box of tissues, the usual boy’s masturbation station.

Tweek helped to prepare himself, as if he’d fooled around with his rear before, it turned Clyde on to watch the unknown expertise, _he_ certainly had no idea what he was doing. When he pressed into the other boy it was _much_ tighter than he had imagined it would be, but as both of them calmed their breathing and stared into each other’s eyes the feeling of their bodies connecting so intimately was invigorating. Tweek was smiling, he wasn’t going crazy and kicking and screaming like Clyde imagined this may have gone, he looked calm and truly _happy_.

A few thrusts in proved to be problematic and Tweek got that crazy look, like the last time he’d hurt Clyde but Clyde gently held the thrashing boy’s wrists to the bed and stilled his movements, saying soothing words to the blonde, “It’s just me, calm down, it’s okay…” Tweek _did_ calm and smiled up apologetically at his boyfriend.

“I love you.” Clyde whispered into Tweek’s ear, the words brought the blonde to release and Clyde soon followed after.

“I love you too.” Tweek mumbled as Clyde rolled off of him.

“I never thought that would happen.”

“Intense.” Tweek yawned and snuggled into his sheets.

* * *

Tweek never thought he’d be able to move out of his parent’s house, he’d never really wanted to. He was twenty six years old when he finally changed his mind. He’d been dating Clyde for over five years now and Clyde had received a job offer in Aurora, he would have to move. Tweek had told him he was starting to like being around Clyde more than anyone, including his mother, Clyde made him feel _safe_.

If he wanted to continue their relationship, which had become quite serious, he’d have to move too. Clyde had even offered to stay at his crappy low-paying job to stay with Tweek in South Park… nonsense, Tweek was _ready_.

Clyde had made extra-sure to not use any home services or devices that gave Tweek the jitters. Although there was nothing he could do about the gnomes or the voices, he _could_ make Tweek comfortable and had been through enough with Tweek to know how to take care of him properly. ‘Taking care’ didn’t bother Clyde in the least even though Tweek constantly asked if it was getting annoying, Clyde figured if people could love dogs and clean up their shit than he could more than love Tweek who wiped _his own_ ass.

Mrs. Tweak had wholeheartedly agreed to the move, she was getting older and it was harder for her to care for her son. Since being with Clyde Tweek had calmed down significantly, been released from several dangerous medications, and even gained some weight.

* * *

Clyde was prepared for the strange barrage of questions when the two stepped into their new apartment, “Are there any sex offenders in the area? Who lives above us? What if they fall through the ceiling and CRUSH US?!I need to google my probability of being stabbed in this part of town…” Clyde had reassured Tweek he’d found the safest gated community apartment he could possibly afford, and they would find a nice place that accepted people like Tweek to work part time, likely a grocery store bagging or fast-food. Clyde _knew_ they’d be happy. He couldn’t imagine himself with anyone else.

It was amazing falling asleep together every night, not spending the night at the other’s house like they’d done countless times, this time they both belonged in this bed. They were in _love_ …

* * *

 

 **END** and happily ever after with the occasional mental breakdown... or something?

 

**Author's Note:**

> X-posted at FF.net, but they're always deleting my stories... guess I'm offensive or something?


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